5 Ways to Help a Friend With Breast Cancer – Suzanne Somers

If your friend has breast cancer (like one of my closest friends), here are five ways to help, support, and love her through this dreadful illness. When my friend was diagnosed, I started exploring Suzanne Somers’ experience with breast cancer, as well as her dedication to finding ways to cure and prevent cancer in the first place.
Somers is an inspirational, courageous woman…
“I continue to put myself out there as a dart board for the medical community,” she says, “Their “darts” are sharp…I am not a doctor, but I happen to have access to some of the most incredible medical minds in the world–and I print their opinions to make sure they are heard.”
To learn about her research into cures and preventions for breast cancer, click Knockout: Interviews with Doctors Who Are Curing Cancer–And How to Prevent Getting It in the First Place by Suzanne Somers. And, read on for several ways to help a friend cope with breast cancer – or any chronic illness, such as multiple sclerosis or ALS…
5 Ways to Help a Friend With Breast Cancer – Suzanne Somers
1. Call, visit, and send emails regularly. I live a full day’s drive from my friend, who was diagnosed a couple of weeks ago (she found a lump in her breast and immediately went for a mammogram, which confirmed breast cancer). I can’t visit her in person regularly, but I call and email her every few days….and I’ll be staying with her shortly after her lumpectomy (which could become a mastectomy). Thankfully, her family members will be with her for the surgery and recovery period.
2. Get “practically” helpful. If you live near your friend, you could help by picking her kids up from school, bringing over a basket of fresh fruit and nuts, or even hiring a cleaner for a surprise housecleaning! I didn’t realize how time and energy-consuming an illness like breast cancer was…and I know the little practical things are incredibly helpful. Another possible way to help is to give her books on ways to prevent and fight cancer and heal from breast cancer surgery.
3. Accept that there isn’t one “right” thing to say. It’s difficult to help a friend with breast cancer when you don’t know what to say! It definitely made it more difficult for me to call my friend, because I didn’t want to keep asking her how she’s feeling or what she’s doing. But, once I accepted that there’s nothing I can say to make things better, I realized that just calling and chatting was helpful.
4. Keep reminding her that she is fabulous! I love this quotation from Suzanne Somers: “We all have creativity in us and we all are multi-dimensional…women are fabulous. We can handle a lot of things.” Telling your friend that she’s beautiful, gorgeous, amazing, creative – and that she can handle this just like she’s handled the other challenges she’s faced – may help her cope with breast cancer. She may be scared or worried about how she’ll look after the lumpectomy or mastectomy, and being told how fabulous she is could help her mindset and emotions.
5. Do a little research on breast cancer for your friend. “Each time I am faced with a challenge, I researched the problems in order to overcome the adversity,” says Somers about her struggles with breast cancer, family alcoholism, and weight gain. “At the end of each search, when I had found my own answers, I felt I had something to share and thought others might benefit from the work I had done for myself.” If you think your friend would benefit from learning about breast cancer and perhaps doesn’t have the time or energy to do the research herself, perhaps you could help her that way.
Olivia Newton-John also survived breast cancer – and her take on it is especially interesting because she asked herself if she created her own cancer to face her fears. Do you think we can create our own diseases?
Have you ever had a friend diagnosed with breast cancer – and how have you helped her? I welcome your suggestions and thoughts below…
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Hi Kathryn,
I’m glad you haven’t had a friend that was diagnosed with breast cancer yet…and who knows — maybe you’ll beat the odds! But I’m glad you know to come to See Jane Soar if that dreadful day comes…
Laurie
.-= Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen´s last blog post..Help for Remarriages – 6 Tips for Coping With Angry Ex-Wives =-.
None of my friends have been diagnosed with breast cancer, but I KNOW it’ll happen one day. I have so many girlfriends, and statistics dictate that some with be struck down sooner or later. Thanks for these tips on helping a friend with breast cancer; I know I’ll be back one day!
Kathryn
Millie,
Thanks for your comment…it’s great to hear from a woman who had breast cancer — and whose friend was so supportive and helpful!
I hope you’re doing well, and that you stay healthy and happy.
Blessings,
Laurie
.-= Laurie PK´s last blog post..How to Save Your Marriage Without Going to Couples Counseling =-.
Hi Laurie,
I was diagnosed with breast cancer 3 years ago, and my friend was incredibly helpful. The best thing she did for me was picking up my 3 kids and taking them out to the park, the zoo, McDonald’s, and just out of the house!
If your friend has breast cancer, try and look for practical things to help her. The last thing she wants to think about is cleaning the house or filling the tank with gas!
Millie
Hi Lito,
Thanks for your insight — yes, I can see how it’d be therapeutic to talk about that possibility of breast cancer. Brushing off concerns of mortality wouldn’t be helpful…as hard as it is to talk about, it may be something she needs to do.
Man. We can only hope and pray for the best…
Laurie
.-= Laurie PK´s last blog post..Tips for Introverts – 6 Ways to Reduce Christmas Stress and Anxiety =-.
It is good to be positive but if your friend/relative wants to talk about death and make arrangements, embrace their decision and help them through it. Do not brush death aside as an impossibility or as pure negativity. The cancer sufferer has valid concerns that need to be dealt with. Confronting mortality is one of them. I found that discussing openly one’s mortality is therapeutic.