Here’s what she says about saving money for your future:

“We need to give [women] more of an incentive to work, to save, to invest, to create a true future for themselves.” ~ Suze Orman

Are you motivated to create a financially secure future — one that doesn’t revolve around a man? If not, what’s holding you back? If you think fear of success is holding you back — don’t laugh, it’s more common than you think — read The Courage to be Rich: Creating a Life of Material and Spiritual Abundance. And, here are eight tips for basic personal finance for women…

8 Smart Ways Women Can Save Money – Suze Orman

1. Figure out what you’re saving money for. Don’t just save money for your kids’ college education or to pay off your mortgage. Save money for fun stuff! For instance, I save money for my overseas vacations – I want to go on a cruise for my fifth wedding anniversary in October, and a two week vacation to Maui in January. A smart way for women to save money (and — even better — achieve financial independence) is to find compelling reasons to save money! Why do you want to be financially free? What are your goals?

2. Write your money saving goals on your forehead. If you want to stay motivated to save money, you need to go beyond deciding that it’s time to save more money. You need to keep your goals front and center! The beauty of writing your money saving goals on your forehead is that they’ll wash off when you shower. Every time you rewrite your goals, you’ll be newly motivated to achieve them.

3. Make two days a week “No Spend” days. “Unspend,” advise the financial gurus at DailyWorth. “No Spend Days are powerful budget-balancing tools. By simply not spending money one day a week, you give yourself more wiggle room in other areas.” I think one day a week is too easy – I challenge you to make two days a week your “No Spend” days! No fancy lattes, no DVD rentals, no 7-11 slurpees (my personal weakness), and no restaurant meals. This is one of the smartest ways women can save money.

4. Keep a running tally of how much money you save. Every time you choose to take your lunch to work instead of buying it, or choose a regular coffee instead of a fancy frappuccino (this is one of my personal favorite ways to save money because I get a coffee out, but I don’t pay $5), write down how much money you saved. At the end of every week, tally up your savings. I guarantee that you’ll be shocked at how easy it’ll be to save money!

5. Figure out how to make money savings tips stick. You hear money saving tips all the time: cut grocery store coupons, stop eating out at restaurants, shop for second hand clothes, don’t use premium gasoline for your. But, do you actually apply those money saving tips to your life? One of the best ways to save money fast is to learn how to make good money saving tips stick.

6. Figure out why you spend money. You can read about the best ways to save money until the cows, sheep, and pigs come home! But if you don’t understand and perhaps even change your underlying financial beliefs, you’ll never get your personal finances in order. Are you in financial debt for emotional reasons — are you an emotional spender? A compulsive shopper? Do you have faulty money beliefs? You can’t achieve financial independence — or save money — unless you deal with your money issues.

7. Stop buying DVDs and CDs. How many times do you really need to watch your favorite movies or listen to your favorite songs? I own and love the movies Chicago, Mr and Mrs Smith, and Thelma and Louise…but there are only so many times I can watch them! “I know someone with a massive DVD collection,” writes Pat Foran in The Smart Canadian’s Guide to Building Wealth. “He takes the bus because he can’t afford a car, but he does have every episode of The Twilight Zone.”

8. Become a library lizard. My husband and I don’t just borrow books from our library, we take out magazines, CDs, DVDs, and audiobooks. I rent Pilates, Yoga and other workout DVDs – which is a great way to save money on fitness. When was the last time you visited your local library? It’s a great place to save money!

“In all realms of life it takes courage to stretch your limits, express your power, and fulfill your potential. It’s no different in the financial realm.” ~ Suze Orman.

To attract wealth and get real about your personal finances, read 6 Steps to Financial Independence for Women.

Related posts:

1. Dealing With Different Money Personalities as a Couple – Suze Orman
2. How to Get Money to Start Your Business – Suze Orman
3. 10 Ways to Save Money on Food – Rachael Ray

In fact, what your Halloween mask reveals could be more important than what it hides.

If you could dress up as anything you want for Halloween this year, what would it be? An Egyptian Queen, glamorous gangster woman, a blonde bombshell Marilyn Monroe costume, or Queen Josephine in the picture? Whether you tend towards superhero costumes or nurse attire says something about your personality traits.

And the Halloween costumes your friends choose – as food items, famous movie stars, or stuffed animals – reveals their personality traits. If you go beyond the Halloween mask, you’ve also found a great conversation starter at parties!

For more info on a wonderful Halloween costume for women – Queen Josephine – click on the image to go directly to Amazon. And, read on for what Halloween costumes reveal about your personality traits…

What Halloween Costumes Reveal About Your Personality Traits

Superman, Wonder Woman, or Cat Woman Halloween costumes. If you gravitate towards superhero or heroine costumes, you could have a child-like fantasy of saving the world and a desire to fight evil. You like the feeling of being omnipotent and strong, admired and revered. Superhero Halloween costumes for women reveal personality traits connected with fantasies of good and evil….which are both part of our authentic selves.

Fairy Princess or Peter Pan Halloween costumes. The innocent costumes of your childhood could indicate a wish for youthfulness, and a desire to recapture the naïve tendencies of children. Perhaps you wish for safety and simplicity. Similar to the superhero persona, you may wish for the magical ability to save the world. Some Halloween costumes reveal not just personality traits, but also secret childhood wishes.

Strong women in history Halloween costumes. If you were to dress up as an amazing woman in history, who would you be? Some ideas are Frida Kahlo, Thelma or Louise (fictional women — but oh so daring!), Amelia Earhart, or Whoopi Goldberg. Whatever woman you choose has personality traits that you admire and perhaps even wish you had.

French maid Halloween Costumes. Your “trick or treat” mask could reveal a natural comfort or inclination towards a particular persona. If you choose an “oo la la” French maid or dominatrix costume, you could be either repressed or liberated in the bedroom. In other words, you’re yearning to explore your wild side, or you’re already game for anything in the bedroom…and you enjoy being the centre of attention!

Rabbits, horses, puppies or other animal Halloween costumes. Animals represent instincts and the characteristics of the creature of your choice. For instance, bears represent power and strength. Giraffes are peaceful and serene; bunny rabbits furry and cuddly. Animals have mythological as well as contemporary traits, such as loyalty (dog) and royalty or self-confidence (lion). Dressing as cat, for instance, could mean you admire independence in yourself — or you wish you were more independent.

Dark vampire or scary witch Halloween costumes. Scary creatures are a favorite Halloween costume trend every year; the scarier, the better, it seems! Choosing a macabre costume reveals personality traits that revolve around a fascination with the dark side, and perhaps a desire to get in touch with your own dark, hidden, nefarious self. If you’re into a gothic witch costume, click the image for more info.

Creative Halloween costumes for women and men may reveal personality traits, but sometimes “a cigar is just a cigar.” This means that sometimes a “trick or treat” mask is simply a quick and easy choice for Halloween – and not necessarily indicative of personality traits!

What are your thoughts on Halloween costumes and personality traits? I welcome you below… 

Related posts:

1. How Not to Lose Your Personal Identity in a Romantic Relationship
2. How to Be Authentic – Diana, Princess of Wales
3. 6 Steps to Healthy Weight Loss – Rita Rudner

About friendship, George Eliot said:

“Perhaps the most delightful friendships are those in which there is much agreement, much disputation, and yet more personal liking.”

Good friends agree about lots of things – and, better yet, are able to disagree about lots of things. If you have a friend that you just aren’t clicking with, read Toxic Friends: The Antidote for Women Stuck in Complicated Friendships by Susan Shapiro Barash.

If you have a toxic friend in your life, you might find Coping With Toxic Female Friendships – Joan Baez helpful. And, here are six ways to tell if you’re a toxic female friend…

Are You a Toxic Female Friend? – George Eliot

Five signs that you’re toxic…

You’re negative, and you can’t stop complaining. Do you hate your job, your ex-boyfriend, your mother, and your last vacation? Fine…but stop talking about it! Expressing your negative feelings is fine – good, even — but polluting the air with a nonstop monologue about how terrible your life is won’t help you make and keep lifelong friends.

You talk behind your friend’s back. You’re a toxic female friend if you share info about your friend, her habits, her work, her partner, or anything about her life. Gossip may feel good (and if you want to know why, read Is Gossip Good for You? – Barbara Walters) — but it just ain’t nice. And, it’ll destroy your friendship.

You don’t remember – or know – what’s happening in your friend’s life. How did your friend’s dad’s open heart surgery go? When is her birthday? How old are her kids? What does she want to be when she grows up? What’s her biggest struggle? You don’t know what’s going on in your friend’s life because you don’t ask. Or listen.

You give back-handed compliments. “I love your new haircut! It makes your face seem so slim.” I’m sure you’ve received “compliments” like this. If you find yourself making snide remarks (and let’s face it, ladies, we’ve all done it), cut yourself a piece of humble pie and apologize immediately. You could even explain why you were snippy (my grandma’s word) with your friend. This example of a toxic female friend is from Kelli Zink, host  of CelebTV.com — and so is the next one…

You put your friend down in public. If you don’t save your criticisms for private discussions, then you may be the poison in a toxic female friendship. Sometimes we need to confront a friend’s bad behavior – but not in public (the same goes for married couples!).

You don’t call, you don’t write. This may not be a sign of a truly toxic friendship, but if you never reach out, then you’re not much of a friend. Being a good friend can involve a quick, simple “Hey – how are you? Haven’t talked in ages, was thinking about you today.” If you never think to call or email your friend, then you’re not carrying your end of the canoe, my friend.

You drain other people’s energy. Are you an energy vampire? This may be difficult to figure out on your own, but it’s a strong sign that you’re a toxic female friend. Energy vampires leave people feeling drained, depressed, and exhausted. They ignore boundaries and other people’s needs. Energy vampires can be “drama queens” — making the smallest incident a huge deal. If you’re an energy vampire…you’re also a toxic friend.

What have I missed about toxic female friendships? I’d love to hear your thoughts or questions below…

If you have wonderful friendships in your life, one way to celebrate them is to throw a Goddess party.

Related posts:

1. Coping With Toxic Female Friendships – Joan Baez
2. Healing Female Friendships – Michelle Obama
3. 5 Ways to Help a Friend With Breast Cancer – Suzanne Somers

 ”The easiest kind of relationship for me is with 10,000 people,” said Joan Baez. “The hardest is with one.”

Why are relationships with crowds of people easy? Because you don’t have to deal with the individual quirks – or toxic tendencies – of one individual. You don’t have to be vulnerable, honest, or understanding…and you don’t have to work things out.

For more info on female friendships, click on The Power of Female Friendship: How Your Circle of Friends Shapes Your Life by Paul Dobransky and L.A. Stamford. And, read on to learn how to cope with toxic female friendships…

The idea for this article came from one of my Quips & Tips for Achieving Your Goals readers, who asked how to confront her best friend’s destructive habits.

Signs of Toxic Female Friendships:

• You don’t discuss your successes for fear of jealousy, criticism, or negative feedback
• You make all the effort to stay in touch; she never calls, she never writes
• You leave your visits feeling deflated, exhausted, angry, or depressed
• You’re constantly “cleaning up” after your friend
• You lie for your friend
• Your friend gossips or spreads rumors (read Is Gossip Good for You? – Barbara Walters for info about gossip!)
• Your friend flirts with your boyfriend, husband, or life partner
• Your friend needs constant physical, spiritual, or emotional support
• You don’t respect or support how your friend is living her life
• You can’t be yourself in your friendship
• You dread taking her calls or spending time with her

Coping With Toxic Female Friendships – Joan Baez

Identify the problem. What exactly is “toxic” about your friendship? What bothers you or makes you wish things were different with your friend? More importantly — is it her…or is it you? Jealousy, envy, or dissatisfaction with your own life can lead you to blame or dislike others. If you’re jealous of her, read Making Envy Work for You – Helen Gurley Brown.

Decide how “big” the problem is. Some problems – such as a friend who is constantly late – may simply require you to tweak your own attitude (eg, bring a book, journal, or laptop when waiting for your friend, so you can use your time productively). Other problems – such as a friend who undermines your successes or who is critical or negative – are truly toxic and may require that you limit or cut off all contact.

Set your boundaries. Figure out what you need to do to “cleanse” your toxic female friendship. For instance, one of my closest friends struggled with my “no taking personal phone calls during the day” rule (I’m a home-based freelance writer, and people think the daytime is perfect for phone calls!). She kept saying things like “I would’ve called and talked to you about it, but you don’t take calls during the day.” Meow. I decided to let it go – she’s an amazing friend in every other way, so I was fine with this blip.

Stick to your boundaries. Though I felt like a jerk and questioned my own “no phone calls” rule, I stuck with it. I insisted on evening phone calls. It’s been two years since I started writing full-time from home, and my friend just told me how proud she is of me! She thinks it’s wonderful that I’m supporting myself as a writer, and she loves that I’m pursuing my dream. See how great she is? I had to set and stick to my boundaries – and it was worth it.

Decide how you want to live. If you want to be a successful woman, you need to surround yourself with successful women! If you have toxic female friends in your life, you can choose a different path – whether it’s cutting off contact or gently explaining what you need from your friendship (and listening to her perspective).

By the way, it’s not just in-person relationships that drive you towards or away from success; it’s the online discussions you read and participate in, the blogs you visit, the TV shows you watch, and the conversations you have. It’s everything you surround yourself with!

One more quotation from Joan Baez: “You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die,” she says. “Or when. You can decide how you’re going to live now.”

What did I miss? If you have any thoughts or questions on toxic female friendships, please comment below…

Related posts:

1. 5 Signs You’re a Toxic Female Friend – George Eliot
2. Healing Female Friendships – Michelle Obama
3. Coping With Negative Coworkers Who Drain Your Energy – Anais Nin

“My husband wasn’t sweet to me,” said Thelma to the cop as she put him into the trunk of his own police cruiser. “And look how I turned out.”

Geena Davis played Thelma and Susan Sarandon was Louise – and Brad Pitt made one of his first appearances as the hottie hitchhiker/bad boy J.D. Click on the DVD cover to go to Thelma and Louise, and read on for ten life lessons from these successful women (which is up for debate!)…

10 Life Lessons From Thelma and Louise

1. You get what you settle for. “I still have to ask Darryl if I can go,” Thelma said. “He never lets me do a g-d damned thing. “You get what you settle for,” said Louise. Darryl treated Thelma like crap – but the thing is, she let him. She took everything he dished out without speaking up for herself. To be a successful woman, you need to stop settling!

2. Celebrate your differences. This life lesson from the Thelma and Louise movie involves not just tolerating your friends’ differences, but celebrating them. Thelma was a married stay-at-home housewife with a domineering, annoying husband. She wasn’t as mature or jaded as Louise, who worked as a waitress in a coffee shop and had a lot more life experience (including being raped earlier in her life).

3. Take care of yourself. Always, always watch your back, even when you’re having fun, even when you’re surrounded by people you trust. Thelma drank too much at a roadside bar and ended up in the parking lot with Harlan; Louise stopped him from raping her. “We’re just having a little fun,” Harlan said. “In the future, when a woman’s crying like that, she ain’t having any fun,” Louise said, voice trembling. “I should’ve f-ked her,” said Harlan. “Suck my —.” So Louise shot him. “You watch your mouth, buddy,” she whispered. Louise knew not only how to take care of herself, she knew how to take care of Thelma, too. And Harlan. That makes her a successful woman…I think!

4. Trust your gut. Louise did not want to pick up that hottie hitchhiker (Brad Pitt); her gut instinct told her to stay away. Thelma, who doesn’t seem to have much of a gut instinct to trust, wanted to give him a ride and wouldn’t stop talking about it. So, they ended up giving him a ride, and it was the second biggest mistake they made.

5. Pick your battles. “He is an asshole,” Thelma said about her husband. “Most of the time I just let it slide.” This life lesson from the Thelma and Louise movie isn’t about letting things slide; it’s about knowing where to draw the line. Setting your boundaries is about self-respect. People will treat you the way you let them – in fact, you teach people how to treat you by how you treat yourself and what you’ll take from others. Successful women set boundaries and stick to them.

6. Buckle up for the consequences. This life lesson from the Thelma and Louise movie runs through the whole movie: Whether you’re hooked up with a bad boy or the most decent husband in the world, be prepared for the natural consequences. Like what? The possibility that you’ll get hurt – whether he’s never around when you need him or he’s around too much. Or, he could steal all your money…like J.D. did to Thelma and Louise. Don’t let this stop you from taking risks to be successful, but just be prepared for what happens next. No whining about the bad stuff!

7. Take turns being strong. Louise was the strong woman throughout most of the movie. Until J.D. stole their money; then, Thelma became strong. Sex with J.D. gave her the self-confidence she needed to take control of her life. By the end – when Thelma was putting the crying cop into the trunk of his police cruiser – Louise wasn’t the only strong woman in the movie. The life lesson: be strong sometimes, and be weak sometimes. To be a successful woman, you need to find a healthy balance between giving and taking.

8. Take risks. Thelma, in her new role as the strong woman, robbed the store to get the money that they needed to get to Mexico to start their lives over again. I’m not advocating robbery – I’m saying that the life lesson from the Thelma and Louise movie is about trying new things and taking risks despite your fears.

9. Open up. Keeping secrets creates distance between you and your spouse, friends, and family. Louise waited until the end of the movie to tell Thelma that she was raped in Texas, in her earlier life. Throughout their friendship, Thelma never really knew Louise because she was afraid to open up.

10. Be comfortable with loose ends. The last life lesson from Thelma and Louise has to be about the ending — because we don’t know how it ends! And that’s exactly how life is: we don’t know for sure how it’s gonna end because it’s never really over…until it’s really over.

What’s your take on these life lessons from the Thelma and Louise movie? Actually, I’m more curious to know if you think they’re successful women! I think they died at the end of the movie…did they live life fully?

Related posts:

1. Secrets of Successful Women – 6 Life Lessons From Maria Shriver
2. What Halloween Costumes Reveal About Personality Traits
3. 5 Ways to Get the Most Out of Your Life – Ayaan Hirsi Ali