“It isn’t where you came from, it’s where you’re going that counts.” ~ Ella Fitzgerald.

But, where you came from can teach you so much about where you’re going – and how to get there! If you keep making the same old mistakes, read Blind Spots: Why Smart People Do Dumb Things. And here, are five ways to learn from your mistakes…

5 Ways to Learn From Your Mistakes – Ella Fitzgerald

1. Look for the blessings in disguise. I’m a full-time freelance writer; one of the hidden blessings of my job is all the rejections I get! I get rejected by editors, publishers, literary agents, clients, and even other bloggers. And I make a ton of mistakes – sometimes I misspell an editor’s name in a query letter, write articles that aren’t exactly snappy, and neglect to prepare for interviews. But, those mistakes are teaching me that it’s okay to drop the ball and everything will be fine. The older I get, the more I realize that success is about learning how to fail and bounce back.

2. Refuse to be ashamed of your mistakes. Confucius says a mistake is only a mistake until you become ashamed of it…and then it’s a crime. If you’ve made a mistake that you desperately wish you hadn’t, then you need to find a way to let go of it. Talk to a counselor or life coach, read books about letting go of regret, or enroll in a class about self-acceptance and self-esteem. Don’t let your mistake trap you in fear, guilt, shame, or regret! Ella Fitgerald says, “Just don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don’t think you can go wrong.”

3. Remember that you did the best you could. This is one of my favorite life lessons: we make the best decisions we can, based on who we are and what we know at any given time. Sure, we can look back and kick ourselves for not doing something differently, because hindsight is 20/20. But, the best way to learn from our mistakes is to tell ourselves that we’re doing the best we can, given our personalities, experiences, and situation. We did the best we could ten years ago, and we’re doing the best we can today.

4. Ask for objective feedback, and do some self-assessment. What could you have done better, or differently? What do you know now that you didn’t know then? You won’t build resiliency or “bounce-back-ability” by burying your mistakes. Instead, ask someone you trust for objective feedback about your actions. Tell them not to sugarcoat the truth: you want to know how to be more successful next time!

5. Figure out the hitch in your glitch. Successful women achieve their goals by learning from past mistakes, because they figure out what does and does not work for them. Learning why the mistake happened – or keeps happening – will prevent it from happening in the future. Are you being sabotaged? Are you lazy? Are you dealing with some serious health issues or life problems? Figuring out the root of the problem is a great way to overcome past mistakes.

Here’s what Lucille Ball said about Ella Fitzgerald’s mistakes: “Ella’s amazing! My daughter says that every time she makes a mistake, it becomes a hit record.”

Remember that your mistakes can become your greatest hits…as long as you don’t bury or hide from them!

If you have any thoughts or questions on learning from your mistakes, please comment below…

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In fact, what your Halloween mask reveals could be more important than what it hides.

If you could dress up as anything you want for Halloween this year, what would it be? An Egyptian Queen, glamorous gangster woman, a blonde bombshell Marilyn Monroe costume, or Queen Josephine in the picture? Whether you tend towards superhero costumes or nurse attire says something about your personality traits.

And the Halloween costumes your friends choose – as food items, famous movie stars, or stuffed animals – reveals their personality traits. If you go beyond the Halloween mask, you’ve also found a great conversation starter at parties!

For more info on a wonderful Halloween costume for women – Queen Josephine – click on the image to go directly to Amazon. And, read on for what Halloween costumes reveal about your personality traits…

What Halloween Costumes Reveal About Your Personality Traits

Superman, Wonder Woman, or Cat Woman Halloween costumes. If you gravitate towards superhero or heroine costumes, you could have a child-like fantasy of saving the world and a desire to fight evil. You like the feeling of being omnipotent and strong, admired and revered. Superhero Halloween costumes for women reveal personality traits connected with fantasies of good and evil….which are both part of our authentic selves.

Fairy Princess or Peter Pan Halloween costumes. The innocent costumes of your childhood could indicate a wish for youthfulness, and a desire to recapture the naïve tendencies of children. Perhaps you wish for safety and simplicity. Similar to the superhero persona, you may wish for the magical ability to save the world. Some Halloween costumes reveal not just personality traits, but also secret childhood wishes.

Strong women in history Halloween costumes. If you were to dress up as an amazing woman in history, who would you be? Some ideas are Frida Kahlo, Thelma or Louise (fictional women — but oh so daring!), Amelia Earhart, or Whoopi Goldberg. Whatever woman you choose has personality traits that you admire and perhaps even wish you had.

French maid Halloween Costumes. Your “trick or treat” mask could reveal a natural comfort or inclination towards a particular persona. If you choose an “oo la la” French maid or dominatrix costume, you could be either repressed or liberated in the bedroom. In other words, you’re yearning to explore your wild side, or you’re already game for anything in the bedroom…and you enjoy being the centre of attention!

Rabbits, horses, puppies or other animal Halloween costumes. Animals represent instincts and the characteristics of the creature of your choice. For instance, bears represent power and strength. Giraffes are peaceful and serene; bunny rabbits furry and cuddly. Animals have mythological as well as contemporary traits, such as loyalty (dog) and royalty or self-confidence (lion). Dressing as cat, for instance, could mean you admire independence in yourself — or you wish you were more independent.

Dark vampire or scary witch Halloween costumes. Scary creatures are a favorite Halloween costume trend every year; the scarier, the better, it seems! Choosing a macabre costume reveals personality traits that revolve around a fascination with the dark side, and perhaps a desire to get in touch with your own dark, hidden, nefarious self. If you’re into a gothic witch costume, click the image for more info.

Creative Halloween costumes for women and men may reveal personality traits, but sometimes “a cigar is just a cigar.” This means that sometimes a “trick or treat” mask is simply a quick and easy choice for Halloween – and not necessarily indicative of personality traits!

What are your thoughts on Halloween costumes and personality traits? I welcome you below… 

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