These reasons why men fall asleep after sex range from biological to spiritual. Women aren’t as likely to fall asleep after having sexual intercourse – for different reasons.
These love theories can increase sexual intimacy in new relationships and established marriages.
After the big “O”, Nikki wants to talk, talk, talk about anniversaries, marriages, future plans, family dynamics, work, household chores – she’ll even talk about the weather if she has to! She’s jazzed. She’s pumped. And, she’s got the energy it takes to keep yanking Todd back from the land of Nod….but she wishes he’d stay awake after sex.
Ah, but look at poor Todd. After sex he can barely keep his eyes open, much less come up with brilliant gift ideas for her parents’ 20th wedding anniversary! Todd is depleted. He’s empty. The elves in the land of Nod are calling his name; he tries to ignore them, but they’re persistent little buggers. Todd doesn’t realize what an aphrodisiac post-coital conversation is for Nikki. He hasn’t clued in that talking increases emotional intimacy, which sets the stage for the next romantic romp and more sexual intimacy.
So, don’t be insulted if your man starts sawing logs right after the big “O.” Men fall asleep after sex for several reasons – and none are related to your love relationship, conversational brilliance, personality, or performance in bed.
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Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex?
Here are several facts and theories that explain why men fall asleep after sex…
Men’s Bodies Are Transformed After Sex
“A man’s body chemistry changes after orgasm. The biochemical prolactin is released, physically altering his body and making him very tired,” says Vancouver-based sex therapist Dr. David McKenzie. In contrast, a woman may not orgasm every time she has sex. She may still be fully or semi-aroused and eager to talk about the state of the union…while he’s drifting off to dreamland.
Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg, M.D., authors of Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? offer an additional biological explanation: “It is thought that exertion during sex and after the big “O” depletes the muscles of energy-producing glycogen. This leaves men feeling sleepy. Since men have more muscle mass than women, men become more tired after sex.”
Leyner and Goldberg state that there is little direct evidence to explain why men fall asleep after sex, though the chemicals oxytocin, prolactin, gamma amino butyric acid (GABA), and endorphins all contribute to that “roll over and snore” feeling. Understanding this may help increase sexual intimacy.
Men Lose That Spiritual Feeling
Tantric sex focuses on the enlightening, spiritual aspects of sex. The merging of two bodies is a sacred act that increases awareness by channeling energy and lifting the couple to a different plane. Sex is the pinnacle of spiritual awareness, and represents the unification of male and female energy. It may be easier to increase sexual intimacy if you think of sex this way.
Leyner and Goldberg suggest that since a man’s “O” is external, it causes the loss of that energy. He’s tired. He sleeps. In contrast, a woman’s satisfaction is an internal explosion of energy. Since she doesn’t experience that same outward loss of energy, she’s ready to cuddle and talk for hours.
Men Are Into Women, But Would Rather Sleep Than Talk After Sex
Psychologist and sex expert Dr Laurie Betito says, “Women like to process their experiences, hence the desire to talk after sex.” Further, communication tends to be easier and more natural for women in general. If a man isn’t a great communicator at the best of times, he’ll be even less likely to engage in a heart-to-heart when he’s flat on his back….and depleted.
“But, not all men fall asleep after sex. Some do enjoy cuddling or talking afterwards,” says Dr McKenzie. “Sometimes it’s the female partner who falls asleep first.”
Do you feel insecure because your man falls asleep after sex? Learn how to increase your sexual confidence.
Are you insulted when your man falls asleep after sex? Comments welcome below…