If you want to get married, you need to think about why. And, take a look at these ways to make him propose…they’ll increase your chances of getting married, and hopefully help you figure out if you want to get married for the right reasons.
Before the tips, a quip:
“Love doesn’t sit there like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; remade all of the time, made new.” ~ Ursula K. LeGuin.
The most important thing to remember about getting married is that marriage – and the marriage proposal – isn’t the ultimate goal. After you get married, you have a lot of work to do! You’ll need to constantly remake your love, shape your marriage, and keep learning new ways to fall in love.
So, while these ways to get a marriage proposal may work, I encourage you to remember that marriage is a never-ending job!
Want to Get Married? 6 Ways to Make Him Propose
Before you obsess about getting a marriage proposal, it’s important to make sure you’re getting married for the right reasons. Do you really want to spend your life with this man, or are you scared of being alone? Have you dated him for at least a year, or are you rushing into a marriage proposal?
Make sure you think carefully about why you want to get married before you rush into getting a marriage proposal.
Okay, lecture over! Here are a few ways to get a proposal from the man you love…
Be a positive, interesting, fun person (but don’t just pretend)
The more upbeat and cheerful you are (without overdoing it or being superficial), the more attractive you will be to your boyfriend. Talk about positive events, memories, and feelings – such as your last vacation, a funny joke, or last night’s episode of Two and a Half Men. Negativity and complaining won’t make him want to get married, and it’s definitely not a way to get a marriage proposal! For every negative thing you say, make five positive comments.
Wear a light scent – and wear the same perfume or cologne all the time
Psychological research from Northwestern University shows that a light lemon smell increases likeability without people even being aware of it. You don’t have to smell like a lemon, orange, or lime tree to get a marriage proposal – any pleasant, barely perceptible scent will make you appear more attractive. And, if you wear the same perfume or cologne all the time, your boyfrien will learn to associate that scent with you. The more positive associations he was with you, the more likely he’ll want to get married!
Show genuine interest in your boyfriend’s life, job, and family
“People are flattered when you find them appealing – and they naturally reciprocate,” says Dr Ann Demarais, co-author of First Impressions: What You Don’t Know About How Others See You. “Also – when you’re confident, you appear more attractive.” Do you care about your boyfriend’s life, work, and family? This isn’t a way to get a marriage proposal — it’s a real question and a real issue you’ll deal with all your married life. If you’re not interested in your boyfriend or his life, then why would you want to get married?
Really listen to what your boyfriend says
This is similar to my last tip, and it also applies to your married life. There’s no point in being curious about your boyfriend if you don’t really care about him, or if you don’t listen to his thoughts or opinions. If you don’t have a genuine, sincere attitude towards your boyfriend, he probably can feel it…and you won’t get a marriage proposal. The bottom line: if you’re in this relationship just because you want to get married, then you’re aiming at the wrong target.
Smile and enjoy your life – but don’t fake it
Whether or not you want a marriage proposal, you need to enjoy your life. A pleasant, happy life makes you more attractive, and makes you approachable and friendly. To keep your face open and happy, think positive thoughts! Be grateful for small mercies (eg, a day without a headache or stomachache) and the luxuries you’re accustomed to (eg, easy access to great articles on ways to get a marriage proposal!). Make it a habit to recall your last vacation, a funny joke, or last night’s episode of Two and a Half Men. Find ways to enjoy your life, that are sincere and real.
Be honest about your mistakes
Psychological research shows that people who make mistakes are more likeable than those who seem perfect. People who make mistakes are seen as more approachable and less judgmental than “perfect” people – so don’t be afraid to share your imperfect personality traits or your mistakes! Being authentic and real increases your “attractiveness quotient” and shows your boyfriend that you’re normal and fallible…just like they are.
You could also read How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You – author Leil Lowndes offers a “surefire guide to love for anyone seeking romantic bliss.”
If you don’t want to wait for a marriage proposal, read How to Propose to Your Boyfriend – The Female Proposal.
I'm glad you're here! My name is Laurie Kienlen; my husband Bruce and I live in Vancouver, BC with our critters. We can't have kids, and are learning to accept whatever life brings - both good and bad. I have an MSW (Master of Social Work) from UBC, and degrees in Education and Psychology. I hope you say hello below - I can't give relationship advice, but writing can bring you clarity and insight.