Is Your Husband Cheating? 4 Ways to Tell if He’s Lying
How to Tell If Your Husband is Lying About Cheating
How do you know if your husband is cheating – and lying about it? These ways to tell if he’s having an affair are from marriage counselor Gary Neuman.
On the Dr Oz show, Neuman revealed the signs a man is cheating, plus four ways to spot a lying husband.
“More than 50% of all men have cheated in a love relationship,” says Dr Oz. “Trying to rebuild trust after an affair seems impossible.” In his audience, 30% of women think they’ve been cheated on…but not everyone knows for sure.
I’m so glad I watched the Dr Oz show today – his tips for love relationships were fascinating! And his guest was M Gary Neuman, the author of The Truth about Cheating: Why Men Stray and What You Can Do to Prevent It, who described five signs a man is cheating.
And Janine Driver of the Body Language Institute shared four ways to know if your husband is lying about cheating – it’s information you can’t afford to miss!
Gary Neuman and Dr Oz Talk About Husbands Who Cheat
Here are several reasons men cheat:
- Monogamy not part of a man’s nature. Biology makes men want to have as many kids as possible, so they cheat with as many female partners as possible.
- Power, opportunity, money increases testosterone. The more testosterone a man has, the more likely he is to cheat.
- Specific genes makes men men more likely to cheat. Scientists are studying a “cheating gene”, which involves decreased levels of vasopressin.
- Husbands aren’t appreciated at home, so they cheat.
- Men aren’t able to emotionally connect with their wives or partners, so they cheat.
How Do You Know If Your Marriage is in Danger?
M. Gary Neuman has been a marriage therapist for 23 years. He wrote The Truth about Cheating
This relationship counselor says 92% of men who cheat are sexually satisfied at home. Only 8% of men cheat because they want more physical intimacy. A whopping 48% say they’re missing an emotional connection at home, so they cheat on their wives.
The women men cheat with are not better looking, younger, or skinnier than their wives. In fact, 88% of men say their affairs are with women who aren’t more beautiful than their wives.
Surprisingly, 77% of husbands who cheated had best friends who also cheated on their wives. This means that who men hang around with can make or break a love relationship.
5 Signs a Husband is Cheating
- Less physical intimacy in the relationship
- Avoiding contact
- More criticism
- Picking or starting arguemnts
- Staying away from home
According to Gary Neuman, a woman’s gut is the most important indicator that a man is cheating.
Neuman also said that lying is worse than the actual cheating. Husbands try to convince their wives that she’s crazy for thinking he’d have an emotional or physical affair – which is so destructive to her self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-image.
Is Your Husband Cheating? 4 Ways to Tell if He’s Lying
Janine Driver of the Body Language Institute shares four fascinating ways to tell if a husband is cheating on his wife and lying about it.
1. Ways of talking can indicate cheating and lying. Wives know their husbands; if he changes how he normally talks or behaves, then he might be cheating or lying. If he doesn’t usually talk in a high pitch or swiftly, then he’s trying to hide something.
2. Specific statements can indicate lying and cheating. When a husband says, “I know you think I’m lying” – they’re saying I’m lying. When they say “You may not believe me, but I’m telling the truth” – then they’re telling the truth. Lying husbands actually tell the truth, cushioned in lies. (Note that this can’t be 100% accurate because if a man knows this, he’ll change the way he speaks, right?).
3. Nonverbal body language is a sign of cheating. Driver calls this the “belly button rule.” When we’re telling the truth and are with people we like, admire, and trust, we face our belly buttons towards them. When your husband is lying about cheating, he’ll turn away from you – and you know he’s cheating! If their belly button faces the door or exit, it’s because subconsciously they want to leave or escape. Also, a shoulder shrug should never accompany a definitive statement. Driver said to never believe verbal statements over nonverbal body language. Also – wrapping legs around leg of chair is a sign of restraint, of holding back, and not being honest. Leaning away from you is a sign of a cheating, lying husband because we lean away from things we want to avoid.
4. Emotional reactions to questions can be a sign of cheating and lying. If you confront your husband about your suspicion that he’s having an affair, and he gets angry, defensive, or overreacts emotionally, then it’s a sign that something’s up. Driver also mentioned that lying husbands tend to laugh nervously or make accusations towards their wives.
For more tips on cheating husbands, read How Long Do You Wait for Your Husband to Get Over His Affair?
Do you think your husband is lying about cheating? Comments welcome below.
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Category: Emotional Affairs, Marital Infidelity
Money makes a man cheat I believe. My husband started cheating when I left for a job. He had too much free time and was making good money. The wknds he wasn’t home. Lied to me he was with his parents. (he knew how they hated me so used them as an escape). This went on for 7 months. I then came home. Moved from my new job and came home. He was always on his phone . He’d get a call and run outside to talk. Of course it was his mom(lie). Then one morning he left his phone on while he was taking a shower before work. I heard a text come thru. It was from a woman saying she wished he was hers. Said how she’d love to have him as a partner. I was shocked. I never confronted him on it. I let it go on. Then came the phone bill. Yep men cheat no matter what.
My husband has been seeing this other woman for about 6 months now. When I first confronted him he said she was a lesbian, but i found a text message he failed to delete that said I LOVE YOU. I found out while I was at church on Sundays he was at her house, smoking crack, helping her with bills, bringing her to the laundry matt, etc. I asked if they’d had sex and he said it didn’t work out, he couldn’t get a hard on, no details He said he called her and told her not to call him anymore, but when I check the phone records he was still calling. We have been married for 30 years and going thru hard timds in our marriage, not intimacy – I was depressed and not interested so I don’t blame this 100% on him, but he still insists they did not have xes and he was there smoking crack. Say he’s no hooked, and it doesn’t appear that he is craving the drug, but 2 things scare me. I need honesty to move forward, and I read that crack is very addictive. It’s been 3 weeks since he’s called as per our phone records, but who’s to say he hasn’t called from another phone. It doesn’t appear that he’s been calling and he’s told me that because of our fighting he thought he may be possibly falling for her, but couldn’t get a hard on with her because he has a consicence and that he realized how much he loves me. We have been cuddling and he has seen how much this hurt me as not being there for me and running to another woman for at least emotional support. But I still can’t get it out of my mind that he is lieing about not having sex with her and got emotionally involved instead of being there for me. It hurts, like a part of me died and I feel low about myself. I want to try counseling to move forward and he did agree to this. We were in our teens when we got married and I do believe he loves me. Any advice would be appreciated! How do we gain back trust.
Hey anonymous, my friend is going through the same kinda thing. What advice would you give me to give her. She ask me things like should I still talk with or see him, should I tell the other woman to have a real chance with him, she thinks if she knew she would leave and then he could be with who he really loves, and should she see him after he is married? What I don’t get is if he’s not married and cares about her why dose he not break off the marriage? I need some problem sloving help! I don’t no where your from but we are from ga and people just don’t like this kinda talk to be brought up its so hush hush but if you can’t talk about it how do you fix it?
Hey anonymous, I have an advice question for you. This happened to a friend of mine recently and she waned to know what to do. Should she still talk to him even if they are married, should she tell the wife what happened and have a chance with the man of her dreams, should she cut off all ties? What did you do are you still involved? We are southern girl from GA and this type of behavior is looked down on , I :just want to give right advice
Hi i have a dilemma which started a few years ago my fiance started getting text messages to do with work from a female with kisses on . I approached him about it and he got very shirty with me and said she’s just a friend . then when i was pregnant with his child i left an answerphone message on her moby saying not to send x on text i find it offensive ( bareing in mind my fiance knew my ex husband had an affair with a woman at work so i felt fragile . then we have to live apart for a while beacuse he is selling his house .. i have our daughter and i had a bad labour felt ill for weeks then i find out my daughter has a heart problem and has to have major heart surgery at 7 weeks old . after a few months move in together don’t find we have sex but worried about being careful after a few months of feeling i’m just relieving him i say get condoms and he goes with it but leaves them in the car and when i ask he brings a few in not the packet i feel consantly the one asking to get pleasure .. then one day out the blue he gets a text with a list of calls he has to do for work and a kiss i confront him he tells me it’s bob which on his phone it was the name it was under so i apologise and say sorry then he has a call in the bedroom and it sounds like a woman bearing in mind close work collegues are men there only one woman who works for the company he tells me the call is a man and he says shhh to me stupid me i go silent and he walks out the door and i’m staring thinking i’m going mad . then afew eeks later he has another text saying “good i’m glad she’s lucky yo have you x” then i confront him and he tells me it’s her and he forgot to delete bob i said do you think i’m an idiot i try and forget in the back of mind i find something our sex life non exsistant and he starts not looking after himself so yet again i say no sex until you start washing your a grown man .. 2 yrs and i ‘m struggling then out the blue this year 2012 i send the number of this woman a text saying happy new year and she text bac just happy new year .. then i say this is steve .. she did make a comment has if they hadn’t spoken for a few years .. but then i say i remember our chats and kisses in the van she replied i didn’t think you would remember ..then i found out they were slyly meeting up in 2004 when i was engaged to him and on valentines day he invited her over he said we had split up but he was always over my house .. saying he loved me i found out they went upstairs but chatted on the bed and she said we did do something but i didn’t know what i just got mad at her when i asked him to call to find out i made him do it … i look bac and don’t know what to do i think he says he only kissed her but they met in secret places you wouldn’t just meet for a peck on the lips and a chat about work … all this has come round again he decided to bring that woman back into his life to text him his calls and when the lorry leaves to text him so he gets there on time and if he didn’t text ba for her to wake him i’m fumming has he ased her to phone him when he is in our bed and i found out there history together … the question i asked is why did you want to bring her bac into your life he says i don’t know i didn’t really need to is that telling me something i’m devasted and don’t know whether we can survive after the harstache we went through any comments appreciated
How do I know if he’s cheating again? He’s done it before to make me hurt. So we’ve been trying to reconcile for almost 1.5years I forgave him for the cheating he said he’d not do it again. He has a drug addiction and I kicked him out well e spent all his time here with us. Well all of a sudden we fight all the time. I found texts to an ex girlfriend where he sent pi of penis and dirty texts like ” wish I was there in bed with u I’d keep I warm”. I confronted him and he called me a bi**h and later appolgized for it. So he hasn’t been here in 2 weeks I’ve asked him where he is getting his sexual satisification cuz he’s a very sexual man he told me he’s been masterbating well after 16 days he came over I found in his backpack condoms about 8 which we don’t use since I’m pregnant so I wonder is he cheating on me. He denies it
I feel as if you and your husband are in a long term marriage and you find out he cheated as a one night stand or in a completely other relationship you can go to therapy find out what went wrong and work on it and slowly gain back what you once had. If he does it more then once leave his ass. You are worth more than that. I dont like divorce so i like to think people can try to work through it the first and only time it happens but more than once is a slap in the face and him saying he doesnt care, which he probabley doesnt. If you are not married and you know he is cheating dont marry him, have sex with him, or countinue dating him that is stupid. If he is cheating on you before there is even anything built, its obvious he isnt looking to settle down and be with one person. The only reason i think people who have been married for years might have a chance at fixing it, is because they built a relationship and fell in love with each other once. Sometimes people make horrible mistakes and then there is of course the whole mid-life crises thing. None of those are an accuse, but a small chance that a therapist could help.
Try reading I Hate His/Her Ex by Alex Cooper – a book for anyone who needs help and advice dealing with their partner’s past relationship(s) – brilliant read! Available on Amazon or most bookstores – Kindle or paperback!
Hi everyone, been with my husband (now) for 2 years before he proposed to me, we got a place and got married 5 months ago. I am 4 months pregnant (im 21 years old now) and everything seemed to be completely flawless until this weekend passed. I decided to go out with my best friend to another friends birthday party, I drove to the lounge and my hubby was totally okay with it, he even encouraged me because he knows how I haven’t been going out because of the rough first 3 months of preganacy. I came home around 1:30am and he is usually wide awake playing on his xbox or something, so I was a little surprised he was sleeping flat on his back on our bed, barley covering himself with a blanket. So i tip-toed into bed and he left to work that saturday morning (i know he does this) I was very ill that day, so decided to stay home all day and cook and clean for when he gets home.
My sister in law told me she posted somee pictures of the two of us on facebook so I went to go check them out. When I clicked on the mouse of the computer, to my total shock and disgust, there was a live porn chat on my screen. I was shocked at the pictures shown and the women on the other end of the camera so i quickly closed it. I then thought of it as a stupid pop up, but it was strange because those sorts of things dont pop up unless someone searches it.
I then went into “history” and found that it was all deleted (which i know my computer saves, I’ve found sites from there before) I “bbmed” my husband and told him that I found a live porn chat online, whats up? he responds by saying, thats so weird, i dunno babe. Than I forgot about it.
I than went into my living room and sat on the couch and put the empty history and the porn chat together and started to cry like i”ve never cried before. He is my first and only and i was so happless.
I “bbmed” him again and told him, “why is the history clear if your not hiding anything from me, if you did what i think you did, I hate you”.
He comes home in matter of minutes, and I’ve been crying my eyes out. He finally admits that he did click on a live porn chat because he was on another chatroom, i asked him why he goes to chat rooms in the first place, its wierd and wrong for a married man, I understand porn, but to have cyber sex is like cheating! I told him to leave because I did not want to be with him (i grew up with my father cheating on my mother) he started to cry and begged to stay, he said it was stupid and he was just bored that day. He promises to never do it again. I can see him paying closer attention to me, kissing me and telling me he loves me.
But….my heart is broken into a million pieces whenever I think of this, I am a pretty attractive girl, in a decent shape and do everything he asks me sexually. It just hurts to know that someone you would anything for thinks you arent enough.
I feel as if every day hes lying to me now…im so paranoid, but i dont show him that. Am i being crazy for over reacting?
I always felt that my husband cheated n me, i ask him once if he have an affair with an0ther woman he said no but the housemaid of my uncle saw them. But he also deny, what should i do? Every time i ask him, he is angry and he reacted so much, he is not sweet as i know him before we got married, for now he loved our 4 months son, is he really cheated on me? Pls i need an advice.
I was told by ,my boyfriends ex that while I was at a doctors appt.She was with him and they slept together she knew my daily activity all day.He told me she was never there and nothing happened.ONE (1) whole yeah later he addmitted to spending the day alone with her and swears on his UN-BORN child nothing happened , and she swears that they had sex.I know deep down it happened it was over a year agao but every time we have a fight he run back to her house and sleeps with her again.Now he says hes different…WHAT DO I DO? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME SORT THIS OUT SOMEONE.I DID TAKE HIM BACK UNDER THE USUMPSION THAT IT HAPPENES BUT I CANT GET OVER IT WITHOUT A COMPLETE ADMISSION.PLEASE HELP ME SOMEONE..LINDSEY 24, FLORIDA
ATT : Lost
Are you an Australian resident? Coz I feel as if I know you.
Are your kids all boys?
Iam too in an uncertain relationship where I have come to believe he is a womaniser.
He tells me he is separated, from his wife but yet a woman’s instinct is a powerful source of intuisium, & I feel he is not being completly honest & not only leading me on with his promises but he is also juggling to keep another woman happy, which is his so called ‘separated’ wife.
Am I the other woman? But that title i have not not earned, i was too deceived to believe his words of love & faithfulness.
Can the lost help the uncertain & the uncertain help the lost?
Been with my teen love for 8 years we r now 24 years old n have a 2year old boy.my. us band works away i n ontario for 28 days n h omw for 2 weeks during all this time he constanltly accusse me of cheating or men coming on to me..I have never done nethin to cheat or give him reason to think I have or would..one day evrything is perfect n th e next terrible n fighting..he tells me somethin is wrong n that its worse then cheating..n doesn’t know how to tell me I don’t know wat to do or say nemore I have treied it all ne adivce
Ok so i have been with this guy for 3 years now and of course when i got with him i knew that he had a girlfriend and 2 kids with her but at the same he told me he hated her and didnt like her she was only living at his house for the kids and of course he lives with his parents. so months and months go by and before i know it and realize it has been a year already and nothing has changed so i start telling him he either need to choose who he wants to be with me or her and he swears up and down that they dont have sex they dont even sleep in the same bed that he sleeps in his kids bed or in his chair i didnt belive him then one night he tells me that she is pregnant 8 months pregnant and we should call things off and of course dumbass me said no it has been this long we can get through this if u really love me so now 2 months later she has their 3rd kid little did i know that was going to make it harder for him to leave because he kept swearing to me that after she had the baby she was getting a place of her own. well she done had the 3rd kid and he is now 3 months old and he is still bouncing back and forth between me and her so i told him he is either going to choose me or her again not even a month went by i went through my phone records cuz i paid for him to have a phone and i found a number i didnt recognize and i called it come to find out he had been talking to another girl and been hanging out wit her so i went and met her and she showed me all the txt messages she was straight up honest wit me so evidently 2 of us wasnt enough he needed 3 women in his life and i come to find out that im pregnant with his child and through all of this his baby mama wit the 3 she found out i was going to have his child so she took her 3 kids and left finally she was gona it was jus me and him things were finally going good i was starting to trust him then he goes to jail for 2 days and i go and get him out and he swore up and down to me that things were going to be different so 2 weeks before my due date to have our child i go back to my house for a couple days and go to my doctor appt alone again and i find out that he had been talking to his other baby mama and she was now back down at his house living there again so i leave for 2 days and he brings her back so i told him that he would regret that for the rest of his life and he is because he didnt get to see his son born. so after all of that we worked out our differences and he moved in with me and my parents house everything was going great then bout 3months of everything going great i found out that he was going to see his other baby mama behind my back we fight argue he leaves for a week and then he comes back and everythings good for a month or so then i find out he is still lying to me about talking to his other baby mama and lying to me about doing pills and how much money he has and what he spent it on jus this last week so he kept asking me if i wanted him to leave and i told him to do what he wanted he is a big boy and guess what he packed his shit and left now he keeps txting me saying he needs me he loves me he dont kno why he left i jus dont kno what to do i have 2 kids and i kno its not good for them to see us fightin i mean only one of my kids is his but still i dont kno what to do ne more
Any woman who knows her husband has cheated on her more than one time AND stays with him deserves what she gets. Don’t HATE the other woman/women…he’s your husband who made vows to you..the other women didn’t make vows to you.
Wow! I feel like our stories have so many similarities. I have been in the same relationship for over 16 years we have 3 children together 16, 11, and 6. We don’t spend a whole lot of time together because of his job and the kids activities plus I work full time job. I recently learned he was reaching out to strange women through Facebook. He mentioned to them that he was leaving me. He had recently got a new work phone and I thought it was checking it out. I accidentally stumbled across some updates. Which lead me to look at messages and find dialogs with more than one women. What alarmed was that he was caring about all these womens lifes and didn’t care about mine life. I confronted him with findings. He said I wasn’t paying attention to him etc. I loved him I wanted us to be okay. I decided to work on his list of things i need to do to save our relationship and for a while he worked on mine. I thought we were okay. He deleted Facebook only to learn he still had my space active. I found message from other women wishing him Happy Thanksgiving and I found message from women texting him her new #. What do I do now? I feel so lost.
“Marriage for 43 yrs. > but anyway– we did manage to survive all the tough times of our marriage. Now that his horrible step-father is dead, my husband has all those awful “weeds” coming up fom all the dysfuntion. His dreams are never happy he says. His mom died of cancer and the truth came out on her death bed..she lived in fear all their married life. I do believe that the people my husband spent time with promoted “cheating” as though it was part of their “manhood”. I think Manhood can also be defined in other ways….One time he told me he “had someone”. I had three babies asleep in the house. I asked him over and over. He goes to bed. I finally asked again-he says: “just forget it, there is no one”. I asked again the next day and he said there is no one. Years later I told him that was the cruelest thing a partner could do their spouse! We had a huge reckoning to each other. I never knew the details. Never. I didn’t do anything when I had those 3 kids asleep in their beds. I couldn’t leave them and he changed his story the next day. I was a very tormented woman. He knew how he hurt me. I let him know. I always wanted to know- I asked him to tell me who he cheated with. He stared me in the eye but wouldnt. wouldnt deny it – wouldnt admit it. I thought-what a coward. Now – as I am older with 6 grandkids that we truly love and enjoy, I don’t think I do want to know the details..There are not enough years left in my life to hold all the tears. And..he is responsible for his actions. I never cheated on him. He is the only one I have ever been with. I read where a spouse wrote, “I have my self-resect about me” and I guess that is me too. a few months back his fave cousin died of cancer. He and all the other family got really drunk and told jokes and professed their love for each other-then back at our hotel he rolled over (very very drunk) and said to me 3 times–”I’m sorry” and “I can’t live with myself”.
Hi all- I have been married for 43 yrs. We had to get married and had our son 6 mos. later. Our early years and total of 3 kids plus his huge family interfering every chance they got….and on and on did put great strain on me (us). He felt obligated to his family because THEY gave the wedding. I would happily have gone to the justice of the peace as we were both 19 at the time. My dad was an alcoholic and kept my mom in total domination. My dysfunction upbringing was nothing compared to my hubbys step father. I will stop for now.
According to this page. Everything listed about “if a man is a cheater” is true about my husband. All of this happened 2 years ago after we had our baby. To this day he still denies having sex with the woman, but a known fact via text messages was that the taxed secretly from his work phone and where planning to meet up on one or her days off of work… I had to work really hard but I forgave him and tried to move on but everytime I think about it I feel like I’m being lied to again. In fact, he did lie to me here recently about where he told me he ways going and where he actually went. Could that have been another lie added to it? Now he’s talking in his sleep about having sex with another person.. Someone please help. Am I an idiot for staying with him?
About a month ago I found out about my husbands affair, a couple weeks prior he started to tell me he didn’t have feelings for me anymore and that he no longer was in love with..but loved me because I am the mother of his children. He also started putting a lot of blame on me for the way he felt..and I knew we did have problems so assumed he swas depressed and maybe if we got marriage consoling things would get solved. We went to our first appointment and he blamed most of his feelings on me and still denied the affair..with a lot of reading and research I decided to check our phone bill that is when everything came out, I found he had been calling the OW as many as 10 times a day. I then started finding dating site profiles for him..so he was confronted about this he did deny until I told him I was going to call the number,truth came out .We started going to consoling together and he found out about many of my past problems with abuse and rapes..he knew I needed help . We have been together for 14 years..and he was unaware of any of my past. I kept it to myself but now I realize all the pain I was holding in for years contributed to a lot of our problems..I always felt empty so I filled my self up with destructive behaviors..Gambling , drugs,etc..and he hated me for hurting him unaware that i had been hurting for many years which ended up causing him to stray..our lack of communication . I am currently getting help for my self..which he stated that he wanted to help me, he told me he was going to end his affair..but he still said he didn’t feel the same about me ..I still love him very much. Well I just got the new phone bill only to find out he started calling her again, I was a complete wreck..I called her and let her know what I thought of her, I know that wasn’t a good move but I did feel better, and then I called my husband..He tried to minimize his actions and. Shift the blame onto me again, said they were now just friends blah blah blah.Well we went back and fourth with our marriage and still are..It has been a very difficult ride for us and our children..Everyone is suffering..but now we are taking action , I am going to work on myself first and then if everything falls into place our marriage will be worked on. I have been put on prozac and seeing a consuller regularly I do have many bad days which cause me to get very isolated and not be there for my kids …I want my life back ..but I want it to be better than before..I really hope time heals.
My boyfriend of several years moved in with me but i always had a feeling something was wrong. One day I looked at his phone that I pay for and saw a text saying I love you babe and he tried to make it sound like it was one of his kids baby mama’s but it wasnt. He has been cheating or this girl says they have been together everyday for five years. I have been with him for Two years. I know he was with other people before we got together and he says she is a stalker but I talked to her and she knew everything about him. I think he uses people to get things that he wants. I believe he loved me but not want you and I think love should be. Now I am pregnant and I still cant trust and believe him. Should I have this baby and be stuck with him for the rest of my life or end it with him and the baby. I am sad all the time and who knows if he did this once he will do it again. It was like he was living to seperate lives. I want to get out but i dont know what to do. He knows everyhting I went through with my kids father and he did the same thing almost hundred times worse. I dont want any diseases especially being pregnant. Help someone
I’m 18yrs old and I’m having an affair with a guy who’s 37 he always accuse me of cheating becuz I’m sexy everyone wants me sometimes I get so fed up of it he constantly keep pushing and accusing me until I found out he’s acting different when I ask him if he’s cheating on me becuz my sister saw him with a nxt woman. I started to laugh then get upset so I decide to cheat on him. The problem I have is that he says he can tell if I have sex with someone else. I would Like to know if that’s possible.
Men do cheat. The guy I was with 2 1/2 years… I finally found out he cheated on me. Like it was stated above, lying is worse… he exactly did that but I just couldn’t deal with his lying towards me. I had enough self esteem to just end it right then. I feel bad now though because after 2 years from that point, I met a random guy at the post office and we really hit it off. We didn’t exchange names or anything but he had no ring and seemed young around my age, young 20s. A few months went by and surprisingly we ran into each other during a church event I had to go too for work, then again the next weekend and we talked again… I asked him if that was his friend behind him and he said no… *looked down* my fiance.. i said oh.. and I walked away.. He eventually messaged me on fbook through one of his friends accounts bc he doesnt have fbook. We started to talk then exchanged numbers eventually. We ended up meeting a month or so later and just sat in my car at this faraway park, talking for hours and hours. He held me for those hours too. Nothing happened but still, I count that as cheating. It got a little above him holding me and I told him it’s not right and I took him back to his place. A few months went by, we were still talking here and there. When he messaged back saying, cant talk. I knew it was bc she was nearby. We basically just had phone conversations mostly through out 1 1/2 years. We met one more time a week before they officially got married. It got a little more advanced with the cuddling and so on… but we ended up stopping and he left. I wish I wasn’t drawn to him because I enjoy our “emotional” conversations. He’s very insightful and honest with me. He’s said before he wishes he left his girl friend before asking her to marry him but he wasn’t sure if taking that chance of meeting me once would end as he would hope for it to be. But now, today, I mentioned how, if he ever becomes single, I’m snatching him up.. in a joking way. He said, he rather die or be single until he dies if he losses his wife. I said, she deserves better than you and so do I.. I’m done with these games.
I know better than this. I always have. because I’ve been cheated on and I know how it feels. I’ve been selfish and I feel sorry for this women. But I do think between him and me, it was an emotional connection. I think about him a lot, more than I should. It pisses me off more than ever but once again, it’s because I can’t have him… but I don’t think I would even want him, bc of how he is lying to himself and his wife. He mentioned once, after they got married how he has to stop talking to me, that she almost found out. but that only lasted a month, like usually.
I wasn’t sure of the details but I know he deletes all texts and calls on his phone, he’s told me so advice for wives, check the phone bills if you feel the need to… if you see a phone number you don’t recognize that is being called or text constantly, times you aren’t with them- that’s suspicious, do some research on that.
And like it was said, pay attention to body language. I feel that, instead of seeing how they react during, watch them afterwards. Maybe play it cool and see if they seem “worried” afterwards.. nervous.. or just ah whatever. Every person is different.
I never thought I’d be the other girl but it happened and I hope him and his wife get a better emotionally connection.
Yes man cheat and you can tell. My fiancee is cheating me with his so called ex wife. I could tell coz he has been so cheeky of late and attention you can tell its now divided. I was tempted to grab his phone one night and Wala there we go clearly in IMs and phone calls. If i ask him he pretends he hates her so much coz of what she did to him in the past. Just as I am writing i am thinking of dropping the relationship coz I have a feeling I might not win this though i love him so much. Comments are welcome pls. He stays alone, I stay alone and the ex stays with their 2 kids. He pays rent for both of us. Whats this really?
My Husband went out to a party of his ex girlfriend. I dont know why but for the first time in being together for 9 years I felt uneasy. I then started checking his phone and his FB messages which talk about he they slept together and him having to pay for her morning after pill. He strongly denies sleeping with he and she confirmed via sms to his number which she thought she was responding to him that he was talking crap. However I still think they slept together but just get the real truth out of him
I guess when men cheat they don’t ever change. The uncertainty about whether he has ever cheated on me is what makes me think I should leave. It’s hard to leave when he may or may not have cheated. I never knew he was a liar until after I married him. It’s just who he is and unfortunately I’m learned to accept that. I guess when he stops providing I’ll probably lose interest in staying with him.
wow where to start? Me and my hubby started off as friends. He was wonderful. He helped me with my children from a previouse relationship. He has always been a wonderful father. I love him dearly for that.. Xoxo.. But he has done some really bad things too. He has had a phone relationship. With another mans wife. Found that out cause of the phone bill. I was doing christmas. He could her everything about us. Now that is small compared to what i have had to deal with in the last 2 years. My husband finally admited he had a drug problem. Not one anyone would even notice. I didn’t know he had the problem with pills till we had been together for 2 years. And had a sweet little one together. Okay 2010 i was still dealing with the first affair. He did all the bull.. your crazy that woman is a whore. What ever he liked that whore. I have spoke with her and came to a point that i forgave him. And no sooner than i forgave him and let up on the whole affair. He pulls another trick. He starts talking to my cousin about our relationship. Everyone could me she was trouble. And i have to say she is little shady. But i still see know excuse for him to ask her to kiss him. And from the way she tells the story sex was involved. This has caused allot of heat ache for me and emberrasment. My whole family knows. But they like to act as if it didn’t happen. Okay so I take him back like a ideot. Now he is back in our lives me and my three children. My oldest is a teenager 11 and 6. So the kids hear us fight they are well aware of what is going on. And this hurts me so bad that it is destroying me as a person and a mother. Then for 2011 i thought this would be the year life would turn around for us.. Little did i know he would pull another trick and ask my neice to do dirty things with him.. He sent a text so i got to see it. So i acted as if i was her. Asked him what he wanted the night before. He ofcorse acted as if it was nothing so i could him it made me feel uncomfortable. He still thinks iam the other woman. He tells here is sorry and to please not tell me. Well little did he know he had already tould on himself. I was shocked. So shocked i didn’t even cry or carry on. Not even a heated argument. I kinda wish the chit would have hit the fan. Mabel i would be moving on with my life. Now i really find my self just setting alone. While he continues to live here. Thinking & working my mind to mush. some days is better than others. But most every night i stay wide awake. Just setting. Not even the desire to watch tv. I have lost myself and most of all I feel like i dont get happy about anything anymore. Like someone having a baby. People getting married. My kids have also took a back seat.. He dont see how this is affected or family.. He likes to run to my family and say cam doing everything wrong i dont have enough sex with him.. Lol sorry i just cant. You asked someone that is like my own daughter. My parents think we should stay together. They like what they see. On the streets. U know the man that is awesome in public and monster all the way home. So i have no support and feel as if they have turned there backs on me. I have to do what is right for my kids. They are the ones that have to hear all the fights.. I dont want to fight with him. I want him to move. Or I will. But how do i tell him? I just know he is going to tear me down. And i really cant get much lower. Cam trying to handle this like an adult. And go about this in a mature manner and i need help. . I would like to also say he has been clean and sober for 1 year.. And that is something to be proud of.. But i have to let go.. If you think i should stay and try to make this work let me know.. I would really like to hear some feed back..lol..
I don’t think these tips for knowing if your husband is cheating is stupid. For some couples, insights like this are just what they need to see the truth about cheating!
Your 5 ways to tell if a man is cheating are the stupidest things I have ever seen. My wife is having dilusions that I cheat on her that have got me so upset that I don’t know what to do. I won’t leave her because I know that she has a mental illness.
I might fail everyone of your tests and I have never cheated.
John
Patty get your kids and get OUTTA THERE!!!!
I havebeen married for 16 years and been with my husband total 19 years.I have caught him about 6 times he has freinds that are females. he treats me like the he does with the kids. he gets mad when is freind look or talk to me if i just next to him. he thinks i cheat but i cant cause i just go to store take care of the house and he callls me 2 times whe i go food shoping i can have freinds cause he dont like anyone i ever talk to. his freinds are no saints. he diens pass incidents like when coming home at or a day later back in the day hasn’t done that for about 12 years. he always wants sex like alot he snaps when i say somthing that is not postive gets very defensive me said i can leave but can not take th kids. he yells everyday and is a serious pot head cause thats how he functions he every smart was valenvtoiran about 5 years ago. and past years had found 3 speptert phones see i catch him but of cousre kills the issue when i need straigh answers he wont leave the kids he tells me to leave well no way well lastweek or so an old girl when my kids wre 2 found him in facebook and she sent him a messsage and stupid him ofcouser he just leave so much eveidence like he emails stuff doesnt know how to shut off the notifications on face book and 2 weeks ago he lied taht his cousin gave him a cell to take over okay lol how did she change it to your name okay lol well and 3 years ago he a a child hold freind that i think the were getting close cause of couse she had a better censahumor then me. well i think i just have been sdestroyied after so much time well that last chic about 3 years ago what i caught was texts and phone logs of times he called. i totally lost it then. since then i been angry and just disgusted and just dont believr ever anymore he snaps at just about everything know i knoe pot does that controols the mind and stuff but omg and he changes his mind like 5 times in oneday with many things so i also think he has bypolar he alots of signs of it well know im a pretty lady a nd love to excersice so look pretty he hates anyone talk to me but i know it cause he can talk to anyone freely but not me my whole life was oneway jay so no im not asking how to handle this i know im crazy to leave right i know but he needs help or just leave im not the kids but no he wont leave i tell him i cant take it anymore well today i broke into his facebook and put more links gether but i do my research very well and when it presented lol im a physcic funny another lady said it too know when u look u find but yes ur mind can can just put other crazy imagainations well i been angry for a long time taht for years when we fight i dont care man years ago when i sure didnt know anything i was like nono dont leave me know wtf im lkike omg but right kno cause i saw facebook and the contacts that match his recent phone he had that lied and a bill was sent to his grandfather saying his cousin gave it to him no im not neive i dotn fall for nothing and he knows for years I h have been knumb well right know i justi can die i just cant anymore but my boys i love my boys they are so smart i dont want to go to work tomorrow know i been strong a long times for years casue other day he said patty i love u blah but yes he mite but me im a good girl i dont have freinds im home for my boys we do stuff but as a family we dont maybe 5 times a year or sothing likekid b day or they got honors but it never fun he yells at us i know it the pot in his brain cause one second nice then snaps then jums to sothing else or the bypolar thing i think he has my kids said it once too they noitce it and i dont disrespect there father to the kids please if they new anything like that omg no words for that. im not miseryabl at all im very happy all the time but just this moment i cant anymore i want to die but my boys and my parents and brother and my sster and my neices and my brothers and my boys more i dont want him to make my kids said anymore cause he yells alot he is wonder ful withthere educaton very strick but like a simple like a glass og water spills it not good my kids when they do somthing they are scaried like mom they tell me im fine it nothing it fixable or whatever we can clean it up but they are freighten wha i would do but whenthey tell me im okay about it aww poor babaies well sorry for typos but im sure u cant makeitout and it funny all the crap i have expericened i say to myself to write a book he dont put his hands on me at all its his brain…
i reAlly think he had the bypolor or whatever it could be but he smart
I have felt like my husband has been cheating for year. He would always get angry or flustered when I would ask about the women he has been messaging or Skypeing with. Now I find out that the one he met while he was in Italy is not a lesbian like they both said, in fact she gets into detail about being with other guys and how it was with him. He replies in the messages, “I wish I was there!” I want to scream because for years he told me it was all in my head, that I was just being ensecure.
I asked my husband if he was cheating and he said no. He said how can we do anything with her Dad and his friend there…. He also is defending her and said I dont know her so I can call her a home wrecking whore. She only comes around when he is there and I found out he called her phone and was on there for almost and hour. He said that her Dad said call her phone if he doesnt answer. I am sick of the lies and the sad part is he almost had me buying his lies. He wont touch me or even sleep next to me anymore. How can I catch him in the act? I know she wants him just by the way she moved away from him really fast when I walked over to him. Please help he says I am crazy and that its all in my head
d*mn heather.. he is cheating
my husband started getting these weird text messages and voice mails he doesn’t know how to change anything like that but anyways i check them often we don’t live together so our relationship is rocky sometimes (we live together sometimes which is better then not living together)but last night he got this voice mail from this girl saying i wish you would let me know if you are coming over you you said you would after dark and i asked him about it when he finally answered his phone he denied it of course and told me to calm down and i needed to trust him more but there are rumors going around where he live that he is having an affair with this girl she is skinnier then me and i am devastated about this i made an appointment to go talk to a therapist we have 4 children our sex life hasn’t changed when we are together if anything he wants it more then what he did before i don’t know what to believe i need help really bad i hope some one can help me figure this out im dying inside and its hard to hide this form my kids
My husband would get extremely angry if I suggested he was having an affair. My gut told me something was wrong. What made it worse is he called me psychotic and said I had mental problems and I started to believe it. He would spend weekends with friends, not answer his phone when I would call and now 20 years later the truth has been revealed and it all makes sense.
I’m sorry I can’t answer everyone’s comments! I would love to, but I just can’t keep up. I guess maybe that shows you’re not alone – your husband isn’t the only one who could be lying about cheating. I’m sorry there are so many men out there who seem to be fooling around. Grrr….
I wrote this article, to help you.
Worst Things to Do When You Don’t Trust Your Husband
Please let me know what you think, on that article or here. If you have further questions, feel free to ask! I can’t guarantee that I’ll have any answers, but other readers might…and sometimes it helps alot just to tell your story and know you’re not alone.
Blessings,
Laurie
If you think he’s cheating…….HE IS!!!!! Be strong and show these men why they need women.