5 Ways to Heal a Broken Heart

These five ways to survive heartbreak will help you move past a relationship breakup and start enjoying life again.

ways to heal a broken heartIf you want to find love in the future, read Better Love Next Time: How the Relationship that Didn’t Last Can Lead You to the One that Will. It’ll help you learn from the past and move into a new, happier, healthier relationship!

“Heavy hearts, like heavy clouds in the sky, are best relieved by the letting of a little water.” ~ Antoine Rivarol. Have you mourned your break up?  Crying is one way to overcome lost love, because tears can be a source of emotional and physical release.

Help Healing a Broken Heart

The most important tip for healing a broken heart is to give yourself time to grieve the end of your relationship. You need to find the balance between grieving and moving forward. Remember that letting go of someone you love isn’t something you do once – and poof! You’re free, healed, and happy! Rather, letting go is a journey peppered with steps forward and steps backward, good days and bad days, peaks and valleys.




1. Accept that your ex wasn’t “the one”

It’s easier said than done, but if you can see your break up from a long-term perspective, it might be easier to accept that the relationship is over. Try to accept that you split up for a reason – and good relationships go bad all the time. You and your partner simply weren’t compatible, and the relationship wouldn’t have worked. It’s in your best interests to find someone new to love.

2. Learn how to let go of love

It’s possible to accept the loss of a relationship — or a person you love — without letting it make you bitter or emotionally closed up. In fact, letting go is something you’ll have to do more and more as you get older — and it gets easier if you accept and even embrace it!

If you’re obsessing about your breakup, you might find How to Overcome Obsessive Thoughts About Your Ex helpful.

3. Make a clean break from your ex

If you want to heal a broken heart, don’t talk to your ex on the phone. Don’t meet for coffee, email, or text each other. Even if you’re thinking of getting back together, make sure you take at least a three month break from the relationship — a clean break! To let go of love, you need to find your self-identity and figure out who you are apart from your relationship.

4. Avoid the temptation to get revenge

Whether your ex-girlfriend or boyfriend cheated on you, borrowed money and didn’t pay it back, or stole your dog… resist the temptation to get revenge. Getting back at him or her only prolongs the painful feelings.

One way to empower yourself is to get revenge – but not in a nasty way! Read 5 Ways to Get Revenge on Your Ex – Without Losing Your Soul for tips.

5. Take control — find ways to empower yourself

Heal a Broken Heart

5 Ways to Heal a Broken Heart

You can’t change how you feel, but you can control what you focus on. You can control what you do, what you talk about, and what you think about. Instead of obsessing about your broken heart, focus on other aspects of your life. One of the best tips for letting go of love is to think about where you want your life to go. Where do you want to be in one year, or five years? Also, think about the great things in your life: the people who love you, your hobbies, your pets, your job. If you don’t enough good things to focus on, now’s the time to make changes in your life.

To heal heartbreak, you need to stop thinking about your ex and start focusing on different ways to cope with the breakup.

Do you have any tips or thoughts on healing a broken heart? Your comments are welcome below. I can’t offer advice or counseling, but it may help to share what you’re experiencing. My prayer is that you find the strength and courage you need to heal your broken heart, and move forward in love and joy.


Do you need relationship help? I can't offer advice, but you can get FREE advice and a FREE marriage assessment from marriage coach Mort Fertel. No strings attached!


This article has been rewritten for my other love blog, and called Breakup Advice for Spiritual Women.

Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen on twitterLaurie Pawlik-Kienlen on pinterestLaurie Pawlik-Kienlen on linkedinLaurie Pawlik-Kienlen on googleLaurie Pawlik-Kienlen on facebook
Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen
Welcome - I'm glad you're here! I can't give advice, but you're welcome to share your experience below. I'm a writer in Vancouver; my degrees are in Psychology, Education, and Social Work. I live with my husband, two dogs, and cat. We are childless, & have made peace with it. It helps to love Jesus :-)

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6 Responses

  1. Laurie says:

    What works for one person may – or may not – work for another! Prayer and spirituality works for me, but it’s definitely not for everyone. I try to have faith that everything is unfolding as it should…

  2. HA says:

    you know life is hard I am in the same conditions but prayer will help you a lot. so keep praying God will help you I will pray for you.

  3. Laurie says:

    Dear neverrmine,

    Your pain WILL eventually subside, and your broken heart will heal. It’s the darkest time right now. I remember just wanting to sleep all the time when I lost someone I loved so much. I thought I’d die from a broken heart.

    I hope it helps to know that you’re not alone. You are a strong survivor, and you will come out of this with more wisdom and strength than you ever had before.

    Your broken heart will heal, and allow you to open up and love again.

    It just takes time.

  4. neverrmine says:

    I AM SO LOST TODAY. OUT OF THE BLUE HE LEFT ME. IDK WHAT TO DO OR HOW TO MOVE ON. I CANT STOP CRYING. I AM ALONE. THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME IVE BROKEN UP WITH SOMEONE. IDK BUT HOPE IM REALLY JUST CONCERNED ABOUT BEING ALONE AND THAT ITS NOT FEELING ABANDONED BY HIM BUT I KNOW ITS MORE LIKELY A COMBINATION OF THINGS. I KNOW I WILL HEAL IN TIME ITS JUST THE TIME IT TAKES. EVERYTHING SEEMS DARK I DONT WANT TO DO ANYTHING I DONT CARE ABOUT NOTHING I JUST WANT TO CURL INTO BALL AND NOT MOVE EVER AGAIN. I HOPE AND PRAY THAT THIS PAIN I FEEL TODAY WILL EVENTUALLY SUBSIDE AND I HOPE NO ONE EVER HAS TO FEEL IT. I ACCEPT GOING BACK IS NOT AN OPTION I JUST NEED TO FIND A WAY TO GO FORWARD. I AM GOING TO TRY AND STAY BUSY WITH WORK AND FAMILY AND PROJECTS IVE BEEN PUTTING OFF AND TRY TO FIND THE JOY OUTSIDE OF MY PAIN.

  5. Thanks for your comment, Daniel.

    It’s good to hear what helped you heal your broken heart….time really is one of the most important things. And, finding ways to let go and move on — because if we just let time heal, we run the risk of getting into a rut. Not growing, moving forward, or making room for new love.

  6. Daniel says:

    I have found a lot of comfort in returning to the little things. Exercising, keeping my place clean, cooking, doing some redecorating. Simple, but they keep me focused elsewhere in way that is healthy. Still have the overwhelm feeling from being heart broken, but so far that has helped the most.

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