Are You Happy Single? 5 Benefits of Being Unattached

happy single benefits being unattachedIf you’re not happy single, you will be after reading the benefits of being unattached! And if you’re already a happy single, you may have a few benefits of your own to add to this list…

“Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you’re pretty sexy and you’re taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.” –  Sex and the City.

Although some would argue that they’ve taking the single thing a bit too far, the ladies from Sex and the City are on to something.

Being single is not a curse — it’s something to savor and enjoy. You can chose to see being unattached as a lonely time spent anxiously waiting for “Mr. Right.” Or, you can chose to view being single as an opportunity to have a love affair with the most important person in your life…you.

If you’re not happy single, read Living Alone and Loving It: A Guide to Relishing the Solo Life — it’ll help you come to terms with your life.

And, check out these benefits of being single…

Be Happy Single – 5 Benefits of Being Unattached

Have you ever noticed that single people think they’d be happier married, while many married people secretly (or not so secretly) think they’d be happy single?

If you’ve recently broken up with someone you love, you may feel confused, angry, anxious, and fearful about what lies ahead.  You may have forgotten how happy a single life can be – the benefits of being single and unattached.

Freedom to go, do, be, and say anything and everything

One of the best benefits of being single is freedom. Your time is your own. So is your money and your home. With no one to answer to or be accountable to, you can come and go as you please. You can schedule activities in advance, or not. You can make a plan and stick with it, or be spontaneous and change your mind at the last minute. You can come home after a hard day at work and fix a gourmet meal, or eat cold pizza right out of the box.  You can let the laundry pile up and watch movies instead of cleaning the bathroom.

If you’re just coming out of a long-term relationship, it may take a while to appreciate your newfound freedom.  If you are not happy single, try making a list of some of the things you wanted to do but couldn’t do when you were in a relationship. Start doing some of them now!

No more “have to” visits with friends and family

If you had good relationships with your ex’s friends and family, you were lucky!  But, if you didn’t enjoy spending time with your ex’s friends of family, you can relax and enjoy doing what you want with who you want. Imagine spending your holidays and vacations doing what you want without negotiation or compromising — that’s one of the best benefits of being unattached!  No more arguing or negotiating about which family to visit for Christmas or Thanksgiving this year.  If you are not happy single, remember that you don’t have to host drunken football parties or weekly poker nights (unless of course they were your idea in the first place!).

No more annoying habits (perhaps the best benefit of being single)

Did your ex snore like a freight train?  Did s/he leave dirty clothes and wet towels on the bathroom floor waiting for you to pick them up? Are you a neat freak who somehow ended up with a slob who couldn’t ever seem to throw anything away? Do you love scented candles while your ex found fragrances annoying?  Did you give up on watching TV because the channel-switching was driving you crazy? Now that you’re single, the only annoying habits you’ll have to deal with are your own. And, chances are you don’t find them as annoying as your former partner’s were.

More serenity – less compromising and negotiating

Even the “best” breakups can be stressful, particularly in the weeks, months, and sometimes years leading up to the end of the relationship. Once you’ve given yourself a chance to cope with the breakup, you’ll welcome the  serenity that settles in.  No more arguments, challenges, negotiations, or fights.  Perhaps you were feeling used, taken advantage of, or abused in some way in your relationship. If you’re struggling to be happy single, remember that life can be emotionally easier when the only person you’re accountable to is yourself.

The opportunity to reinvent your dating life

One of the most exciting benefits of being single, particularly after recovering from a broken relationship, is the ability to reinvent your dating life! You’ve had a chance to learn more about what you don’t want in a partner, and chances are you’ve learned a lot more about yourself, your needs, and your desires. Some of these revelations may have come from lessons learned during the course of your relationship, but many others will become clearer as you spend more time being single.  To be happy, celebrate the opportunity to experiment (safely!) with dating people who are different from your former partner, whose values and temperament are more aligned with the person you’ve become.

Being single doesn’t have to be an ending.  It can be a great beginning of the next chapter in your life.  You may not remain single forever, so be sure to enjoy having a love affair with yourself now that you can.

If you’re struggling to move on after a breakup, read 75 Ways to Let Go of Someone You Love.

Are you happy single? I welcome your thoughts or questions below – especially if you have more “best benefits” of being unattached to share!

Written by Sydney Tyler Thomas, a writer and small business owner living in Virginia. She is author of The Joy of Soulful Knitting: Reflections on the Art of the Craft. You can also visit Sydney at her blog, New Calling.

Sydney also wrote How to Save Money on RV Travel by Spending Less on Camper Gas, here on Quips and Tips for Money and Love. Yes, you can tackle the open road as a single person!


Writing about your feelings and experiences is the best therapy - I welcome your comments and I read them all! But I regretfully can't offer personal advice.



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Category: Breaking Up, Separation & Divorce

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