What’s the best gift you can give yourself after the heartbreak of a bad breakup?
It depends on your personality and lifestyle – but it definitely involves pampering yourself with beauty, music, massages, and messages of faith, love, hope, trust, and peace.
“From the first moment that you have the wind knocked out of you by hearing in one way or another that the relationship is over, you must ruthlessly prioritize doing as little as possible,” writes Delphine Hirsh in The Girls’ Guide to Surviving a Break-Up. “By that I mean you must accept that you are in shock and that you should expect nothing from yourself other than to keep breathing.”
If you’re still in shock over the breakup, take Hirsh’s advice and give yourself time to heal. Practice “self-care”, which simply means taking care of yourself.
Pamper yourself with a healing spa gift basket – it may be one of the best gifts you can give yourself when you’re dealing with heartbreak!
10 Gifts to Give Yourself After a Breakup
Enjoy the gift of beautiful scents
“Natural scents have a direct pathway to the brain and research shows that some chemical constituents of aromatherapy oils, particularly…sesquiterpenes that cross the blood-brain barrier and increase oxygen flow to the brain,” says Michelle Schoffro Cook, author of The Brain Wash.
Pleasant scents improve oxygen flow in your brain, which increases energy, immune function, learning, attitude and positive emotions…all of which you need if you’re coping with a breakup. A lovely gift to give yourself is pampering with scents that make you feel good.
The Essential Oil Sampler Gift Set includes several beautiful scents such as eucalyptus, lavender, lemongrass, orange, peppermint, and tea tree to help you feel good.
Pamper yourself with the gift of music
Soak in classical, easy listening songs or rock ‘n roll music – it’s one of the best ways to cope with a breakup. Music can soothe your soul, and is a lovely gift to give yourself. Faster, major keys cool your brain, which lifts your mood and helps you cope with negative emotions. Slow, healing music can relieve stress and ease emotional pain.
If you don’t know what music to pamper yourself with, read The Best Songs for Broken Hearts.
Give yourself with the gift of art and creativity
I’m not talking about buying paintings, I’m talking about painting, arranging photographs, sculpting, or drawing. Making art strengthens your sense of self and contributes to feelings of normalcy. Plus, it’s relaxing to focus on being creative — and it’ll help you cope with a breakup by distracting you from your emotions. Creativity increases serotonin levels and reduces stress; it also improves blood pressure and heart rate. Anything artistic can help create you create a new identity and even let go of someone you love.
I’m no artist, but I loved reading The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. You don’t have to be good at art to pamper yourself with the gift of creativity after a bad breakup!
Enjoy the gift of good news
Skip the evening news – it doesn’t do anything to pamper your mind, body, or soul. Ongoing exposure to depressing, negative information can make you paranoid, anxious and physically unhealthy – and the evening news will not help you cope with a broken relationship. This tip will decrease the stress-related hormones that contribute to high blood pressure, depression, digestive disorders, and a weaker immune system. The healthier you are, the faster you’ll heal.
One of the best gifts you can give yourself after a breakup is to surround yourself with happy, positive things.
Pamper yourself with the gift of spirituality
Pursuing spirituality within a group (a church or synagogue, for instance) increases your social support system, coping skills, and self-image. Recently, researchers found that even people who pray online have fewer negative emotions and higher levels of well-being. If you’re coping with a breakup, try connecting to God or the universe. You’ll feel less fearful and anxious, which will improve your health and immune system.
A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose is one of the most popular books on spirituality, and it could be the best gift you give yourself after a breakup.
Give yourself with the gift of nutritious foods
This is probably the most boring gift to give yourself after a bad breakup, but it’s the healthiest! Eating nutritiously and taking care of your body is difficult when you’re sad and lonely — but that’s when your body needs nutrition the most. Avoid refined sugar, heavy meats, processed foods, and caffeine because they make you feel sluggish and tired, which will not help you cope with a breakup. It’s a gift to take care of your body: eat fish, whole grains, raw nuts, seeds, beans, legumes, wild rice and of course plenty of fruits and vegetables.
If you struggle with weight, overeating, or food issues, read A Course In Weight Loss: 21 Spiritual Lessons for Surrendering Your Weight Forever. I love this book – it’s a gift I’ve given myself, even though I’m not going through a breakup.
Practice the gift of a balanced life
Balance is the key to emotional and physical health. If you’re frantically juggling personal, professional, volunteer and social activities, there’s no doubt that your emotional health will suffer and you’ll have a hard time coping with your broken love relationship. Overdoing it can also include spending too much time alone watching tv, lying in bed, or snoozing.
Balance means leaving work or volunteer duties to spend time with family and friends — or pulling away from family and friends to read, walk, or pursue a new hobby.
Pamper yourself with the gift of a massage or spa day
Get a massage – it does more than alleviate sore muscles! Emotional struggles, such as depression and anxiety, can be healed by massage because it reduces the amount of cortisol in your system and promotes an overall sense of well-being. According to the Massage Therapy Association of Manitoba, “massage promotes elimination of waste products, improves flow of nutrients to body tissues, and increases circulation to all parts of the body.”
A Tranquil Delights Lavender Spa Bath and Body Tote can be one of the best gifts you give yourself.
Learn the gift of visualization
Picture your future love relationships: be hopeful, optimistic, and confident. Guided imagery or visualization can help you heal from a broken relationship. It involves three steps: 1) relaxing; 2) focusing on pain; 3) replacing painful feelings with healthy images. Visualizing what you want your future love relationships to look like can help you cope with a breakup. Visualization floods your body with good hormones and positive feelings.
Picturing a happy future can be help you let go of someone you love.
Give the gift of expanding your horizons and exploring your brain’s nether regions
Go to museums, visit art galleries, do crossword puzzles! Using your brain to get into the flow of an activity – whether it’s exploring an art gallery or solving a Sudoku puzzle – will help you escape the pain of the breakup. When you’re focused on a puzzle or intellectual pursuit you’re not thinking about your pain or ex-partner. When you’re ready, this gift tip may even help you meet new people.
Need more gift ideas? Read Gifts to Give Someone Going Through a Divorce.
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