I have been married two years. We found out my husband has azospermia last October. It has been very hard for me to deal with. I thought things would happen naturally after we were married. We were open to adoption and looked into adoption but the wait can be long 3-5 years for a healthy Asian infant (we are both Asian) and wanted a child that looked like us. We may still try adoption. However, since I am 37 y.o I wanted to give sperm donor a try. My husband was agreeable to this. I don’t have to take hormones. I just go in at time of ovulation for an intrauterine insemination once a month. The first time I had so much hope in this that when my period came I was so depressed. We are trying again. I am starting to feel down again and worried how I can deal with the disappointment if my period comes next week. It is berry hard dealing with this roller coaster. Thank you for the advice above. I really should try to be out more and exercise again. I really feel like giving up on my goals but you are right that we should refocus…

I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been dealing with disappointment of not being pregnant for five years! That’s such a long time. And sometimes it’s worse to get the “everything is normal” explanation, because then what? It’s frustrating, and makes you feel powerless and helpless. I’m sorry.

Here’s an article I wrote for couples who have no reason for not getting pregnant:

Unexplained Infertility – What to Do When You Can’t Conceive

I hope it helps, and welcome your further comments here or there.

Also, have you thought about adoption? But it’s a myth that if you adopt, you’ll get pregnant! It’s just a great way to start a family, for some couples.

Blessings,
Laurie

we have been trying to conceive for 5 years now without any luck.
does someone have any advice. we went to the doctors but they say all is normal……

please help….

I wrote this article for you:

When You Lose a Baby – How to Overcome Sadness and Keep Trying

I hope it helps, and welcome your thoughts.

Dear Farah ~ I’m sorry, but I’m not sure what you’re asking. Are you worried about being pregnant? If you could be more specific, I might be able to give you a few thoughts.

Blessings,
Laurie

Many of my friends and family say I am putting too much stress on myself and that is why I am not getting pregnant, but its hard not to stress about it. Each time I see a pregnant person I think about how far along I would have been if the first pregnancy would have lasted. Any ideas how to reduce the stress and sadness of losing a baby and trying for another baby?

Thanks
Joy

Thanks for sharing about your HSG test — and believe me, I know how you feel about IVF treatments! And I know how frustrating it is to see other women get pregnant at the drop of a hat, and many of them don’t even want kids yet. When writing an article for BC Women’s Hospital, I learned that over 50% of pregnancies are unplanned.

I think the best way to go through fertility treatments is not to have any expectations at all. Pray for the strength to accept whatever comes your way.

And, just take it one step at a time. Not even one day at a time — take it one minute at a time!

I chose not to go through IVF treatments. I’m disappointed we never got pregnant, but I just didn’t want to do IVF. But, some women go through it many times — and are so happy when they have a baby. To each her own!

Let me know how your journey unfolds.

Blessings,
Laurie