How to Network for Shy, Quiet Types (Introverts!)
Are you a shy, quiet type? Then it’s especially important to learn how to network. Here are several networking tips for introverted personalities, to help you succeed and achieve…
Before the tips, a quip:
“Most Americans, whether introverted or extroverted, have learned to look like extroverts,” writes psychologist Laurie Helgoe in Introvert Power.
However, 57% of the U.S. population are introverts or have mostly introverted personality traits – which means that most of us are ignoring our true personalities! For more info on introversion, read Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength by Laurie Helgoe.
And, here are networking tips for introverts who want to be more successful….
How to Network for Shy, Quiet, Introverted Types
Introverts have an inward focus, don’t enjoy being the center of attention, and find groups of people draining. Introverts are private people, and would rather be at home alone or with another person or two than at large parties or events. Are you an introvert? Take this Test for Introverted Personality Traits.
1. Meet clients one-on-one. If you’re an introvert, you find that groups of people drain you of energy and may even make you feel uncomfortable. Instead of networking at work parties or in large group settings, create ways to network with individuals. This tip for networking successfully may take more time (talking to colleagues in large groups provides more opportunities in a shorter amount of time) – but you’ll find yourself making more meaningful connections and achieving your professional goals.
2. Reward yourself for overcoming obstacles. If you bite the bullet and network at a work function, find ways to pat yourself on the back later! Get a massage or see a movie in the middle of the day — whatever your version of “reward” is. The more positive associations you create when you overcome obstacles, the easier stepping outside your comfort zone and making new contacts will become.
3. Network with other introverts. A great tip for networking successfully is to find like-minded folk. It can be draining for introverts to spend time with extroverts. Recharging your batteries includes spending enough time alone, connecting with people who understand you, and accepting your personality type.
4. Connect with extroverts. As an introvert, you may find it challenging to achieve your professional goals because success requires other people (and most introverts like to work and be alone). Extroverts enjoy making contacts, meeting people, schmoozing, and working the room at all types of functions…and thus make excellent business partners and work colleagues for introverts. This can be a healthy, symbiotic relationship for both sides (most extroverts don’t enjoy working on tasks that take them away from people).
5. Learn how to make small talk. This tip for networking successfully for introverts can be learned quite easily! Making small talk is a skill that you can practice at home, around the water cooler at work, at family functions, and standing in line at the grocery store. Small talk helps you get to know colleagues and clients better – and lets them know you better, too. Never underestimate the power of small talk!
6. Find creative ways to market yourself. To achieve your professional goals, you may be okay with leaving your comfort zone and doing the “extroverted” thing: making speeches, teaching classes, running meetings, or even making television or radio appearances. But if your introverted personality style prohibits you from taking those risks – or if you just don’t wanna – then you need to find other ways to network successfully. Try making online appearances (eg, teleseminars or podcasting) or using your website or blog to attract new clients. If you find ways to succeed that revolve around your natural personality traits, you won’t lose yourself in your quest for success.
Here’s another article that can help you take your career a step farther: How to Convince People to Say Yes – 5 Persuasion Techniques.
Are you a shy, quiet type who can’t network? Comments welcome below…
Category: Career, Motivation Tips, Personality Traits & Types, Success Tips, Workplace Tips
Hello Jerry,
Thanks for your comments, and for your link to more tips for networking successfully for shy, quiet people!
One thing I’ve noticed lately is that social media (Twitter, Google Plus, Facebook) is totally draining me. I didn’t think that online interaction is just as exhausting for introverts as in-person interaction is, but it is.
I just want to write. And answer comments on Quips and Tips!
Blessings,
Laurie
@Laurie
Very helpful and informative. You set down some really great guidelines to commit to action. Being an introvert myself, having steps to follow in a systematic manner seems to make networking a little easier. More free tips from: http://www.helpforthenetworkingintrovert.com/
Hmmmm….thanks for your thoughts on introverted and extroverted personality traits, Ann! I don’t agree that personality traits aren’t important, though…I think personality can override what you want and how you want it.
What a thread and what opinions. I can just laugh. Someone defined the people on introvert and extrovert and then everyone is following the definition and how one or the other is successful or not. How come people do not get it? Has nothing to do with your personality but what you want and how you want it! For God’s sake people
I am an extrovert and introvert too, in different situations with different people. What about it?
Hi Kikie,
Yes, it’s definitely possible for two introverts to fall in love and get married! I’m an introvert, my husband is an introvert, and our marriage is better now than the day we married five years ago.
It sounds like there’s more going on with your boyfriend than “just” being an introvert. If he doesn’t like who he is, then it doesn’t matter if he’s introverted, extroverted, or a Martian.
The issue isn’t your personality traits, I don’t think. It’s his self-perception.
Maybe letting go of him is the healthiest thing you can do in the long run, as heartbreaking as it is in the short run. Maybe he needs time to learn how to love and accept himself. Until he does that, he won’t be able to loe and accept anyone else.
Wishing you all the best,
Laurie
Dear Lei,
I’m so sorry I missed your comment! You asked a fantastic question.
Let me know if you’re still around — if you are, I’d be happy to give you my thoughts.
My short answer is no, I don’t think pretending to be an extrovert will get you what you want. You CAN find happiness and fulfillment as an introvert!
Laurie
Hi Laurie,
Is it possible for 2 introverts to fall in love and get married? My boyfriend decided that we should separate because we are both introverts and will only be sad. Is this true? Well he is an unstable introvert and I am stable but, it has occurred to me that he hates himself for being an introvert. I am hurt.
I’ve been looking up a lot of information about being an introvert. Your articles are helpful in recognizing that I am a definite introvert. I do feel that your article is suggesting that introverts behave more like extroverts. No, I am not attacking your article or you however, it seems that introvert personalities are less likely to get the same job an extrovert is also applying for. Employers seem to only want people who will socialize with anyone. Most jobs are sales, sales need representatives, these representatives need to be outgoing, energetic, talkative to secure sales. Now where does that leave the detail-minded, punctual, articulate, diligent introvert? I can honestly say that I only landed my current job because i pretended to be an extrovert on that interview…I was in desperate need for a paycheck! No 3 years later I am miserable, but can’t quit because jobs that suit me are hard to come by. To sum it up, would you agree that pretending to be an extrovert is more likely to get you what you want?
–confused