Surviving a Breakup – 10 Tips for Moving On When Your Relationship Ends

how to get over relationship ending

How Do You Survive a Breakup?

If you think you can’t survive your breakup, you’re wrong. It may take a few months, but you will become a better, happier, more confident person with these creative ways to move on when your relationship ends.

“From the first moment that you have the wind knocked out of you by hearing in one way or another that the relationship is over, you must ruthlessly prioritize doing as little as possible,” writes Delphine Hirsh in The Girls’ Guide to Surviving a Break-Up. “By that I mean you must accept that you are in shock and that you should expect nothing from yourself other than to keep breathing.”

If you’re still in shock over the breakup, give yourself time to heal. If you can’t seem to break free from the past, read Letting Go of Someone You Love — it offers 75 tips from psychologists, life coaches, and counselors.

And, use one or all ten of these ten tips for healing your broken heart…

10 Creative Ways to Survive a Breakup

Sniff your way to happiness

Michelle Schoffro Cook, author of The Brain Wash, says, “Natural scents have a direct pathway to the brain and research shows that some chemical constituents of aromatherapy oils, particularly…sesquiterpenes can cross the blood-brain barrier and increase oxygen flow to the brain.” Extra oxygen in your brain increases energy, immune function, learning, attitude and positive emotions…all of which you need if your relationship ends!

Soak in classical, easy listening or rock ‘n roll music

Faster, major keys cool your brain, which lifts your mood and helps you stay happy after heartbreak. You know what songs work for you: find music from a different, happier era of your life. Don’t know what to listen to? Read The Best Songs for Broken Hearts.

Paint, arrange photographs, sculpt, or draw

Making art strengthens your sense of self and contributes to feelings of normalcy. Plus, it’s relaxing to focus on being creative — and it’ll help you survive a breakup by distracting you from your emotions. Creativity increases serotonin levels and reduces stress; it also improves blood pressure and heart rate. Anything artistic can help create you create a new identity and even let go of someone you love.

Skip the evening news – your relationship breakup is depressing enough

Ongoing exposure to depressing, negative information can make you paranoid, anxious and physically unhealthy – and the news will not keep you happy after heartbreak. Skipping the evening news will help you produce fewer stress-related hormones that contribute to high blood pressure, depression, digestive disorders, and a weaker immune system. The healthier you are, the faster you’ll heal after a break up.

Get a massage – it does more than alleviate sore muscles





To survive a breakup, make sure you get lots of healthy touch! Emotional struggles, such as depression and eating disorders, are positively affected by massage because it reduces the amount of cortisol in your system and promotes an overall sense of well-being. According to the Massage Therapy Association of Manitoba, “massage promotes elimination of waste products, improves flow of nutrients to body tissues, and increases circulation to all parts of the body.” The healthier and happier you feel, sooner you’ll survive when your relationship ends.

Imagine a bright, loving, hopeful future

Guided imagery involves three steps: 1) relaxing; 2) focusing on pain; 3) replacing painful feelings with healthy images. Visualizing what you want your future to look like can help you achieve your goals – and it floods your body with positive chemicals and feelings. Most physical, emotional and behavioural symptoms are affected by your thoughts and attitude; positive images can help you survive a breakup.

Eat broccoli (a surprising way to survive a breakup!)

Eating nutritiously and taking care of your body is difficult when you’re in pain or grieving – but it’s when you’re down and out that your body needs nutrition the most. Avoid refined sugar, heavy meats, processed foods, and caffeine because they make you feel sluggish and tired, which will not help you survive a broken relationship – especially if you’ve split up with your partner. Eat fish, whole grains, raw nuts, seeds, beans, legumes, wild rice and of course plenty of fruits and vegetables.

Explore museums and solve crossword puzzles

Using your brain to get into the flow of an activity – whether it’s exploring an art gallery or solving a Sudoku puzzle – will help you escape the painful feelings and let go of someone you love (even if it’s just for a short time). When you’re focused on a puzzle or intellectual pursuit you’re not thinking about your pain or ex-partner. This tip for surviving a break up may even help you meet new people…

Dig into your spirituality – it increases optimism and positive feelings

Pursuing spirituality within a group (a church or synagogue, for instance) increases your social support system, coping skills, and self-image. Recently, researchers found that even people who pray online have fewer negative emotions and higher levels of well-being. If you’re surviving a breakup, try connecting to God or the universe. You’ll feel less fearful and anxious, which will improve your health and immune system.

Strive for balance (it’s the key to emotional and physical health)

If you’re frantically juggling personal, professional, volunteer and social activities, there’s no doubt that your emotional health will suffer and you’ll have a hard time surviving a breakup. Overdoing it can also include spending too much time alone watching tv, lying in bed, or snoozing. Balance means leaving work or volunteer duties to spend time with family and friends – or pulling away from family and friends to read, walk, or pursue a new hobby. When your relationship ends, you need to take care of yourself by adding balance to your life.

Want to get him back? The Magic of Making Up is a gentle way to approach your ex.

If you want to pull all the punches, read How to Get Your Ex Back.

Sometimes writing about how your relationship ended can make you feel better, because writing is great therapy! Feel free to share how you’re surviving your breakup below.


Writing about your feelings and experiences is the best therapy - I welcome your comments and I read them all! But I regretfully can't offer personal advice.



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Category: Breakup Survival Tips

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  1. Kate A says:

    Dear Angie, wihtout knowing all the details of the situation… it is difficult to tell you anything at length. I would say do your best to keep your head up and fill your life with good. Take time out to enjoy the simple pleasures life has to offer. Be supportive to the man behind bars… but dont wait around for him… do your best to move forward. And as for the business aspect, get another/other foreman… You have to think of yourself as completely in charge, and take responsibility for the company and its success. You can do it!!!

  2. mrpbros says:

    i had a very bad experience over love. I broke up with my girlfriend only bcoz of able to give time spend together. Since last breakup i didn’t made any girlfriend… Its realy painful…

  3. Angie says:

    My situation I guess is a bit odd and that is why I am having an issue dealing with it. I was dating someone for quite a while, everything was going great. We were still happy to see each other and enjoyed each others company. We were at the point that we discussed moving in together and looked at houses a couple of weeks ago. A month ago we started a business together, so you would think that with everything progressing the way it was it was going great. I spoke to him monday while he was working then we were texting. I got busy with paperwork and several hours sent a text to see how everything was progressing on the job. I got no response. So I figured he’s busy he will get back to me later. Around 11pm at night several hours later did not hear anything from him, not even that the job was completed so I knew if I should bill it out. I called and left a voicemail, but his phone was off. I found it to be odd, but figured batteries dead. The next morning I find out that he was arrested about 10 minutes after our last text for not paying traffic fines and there are several I guess. Not to mention that he was on probation, that I knew nothing about from a DUI three years prior to us meeting. So I know that he ended up with a violation of probation charge also. I have not talked to him since he has been in jail and is still there. I have talked to the jail and caseworker there. I do not know if I should go visit or if I should just do the best to move on. They told me he is probably going to be there for quite a while. My issue other than hurt from the unknown information, is that it is a contracting business and he was the foreman. I do not know what to do with that mess either. This has not only effected me emotionally, but it is effecting my income also at this point. I would love to hear any suggestions or words of encouragement that anyone has. I have never been in this situation and obviously it is not a good one.

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