10 Tips for a Lifetime of Love and Happiness With Your Partner
Creating a lifetime of love and happiness with your spouse or partner is alot less difficult with these tips! Here, Dr Sue Johnson – author of Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love — focuses on building strong marriages, based her work with emotionally focused therapy (EFT).
“You think love is illogical, random and mysterious, yes?” asks Dr Johnson. ”Not anymore! We have cracked the code. In the last few years, social scientists and therapists who practice emotionally focused therapy (or EFT) have made a breakthrough. Now, at the beginning of the 21st century, we have a map to this passion, this fever that has baffled poets and lovers all through human history.”
For more info on Dr Johnson’s book, click Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
10 Tips for a Lifetime of Love and Happiness With Your Partner
If you and your partner seem to argue all the time, you might find 11 Tips for Fighting Fair in Marriage helpful.
1. We are born to need each other. The human brain is wired for close connection with a few irreplaceable others. Accepting your need for physical and emotional connection is not a sign of weakness, but of maturity and strength.
2. In a marriage, there is often a mixture of anger, sadness but most of all, fear. Fear of being abandoned and rejected. This hurt registers in the same part of our brain as physical hurt, and it is hard to push these feelings aside or ignore them. One of the first tips for a lifetime of love and happiness with your partner is to pinpoint the feeling and then to send clear messages about this hurt to the one you love.
3. The strongest among us are those who can reach for others. Love is the best survival strategy of all. We all long for a safe haven love relationship. Self-sufficiency is just another word for loneliness. So, if youwant a lifetime of love and happiness, then say what is in your heart!
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The rest of this article has been moved to my new site, “Quips and Tips for Love Relationships.”
Please click 10 “Love Laws” From Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy to continue reading!
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Do you have any questions or thoughts on these tips for a lifetime of love and happiness? Feel free to share them below!
Dr. Sue Johnson is a psychologist and the developer of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy.
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Comment by Nancy on 23 May 2009:
Thank you for so many great articles. My husband and I read new articles every morning in hopes to improve our marriage. We went through a rough patch and am trying to smooth things out for the future. In hopes that it wouldn’t happen again. We are looking for new ways to cope with problems instead of having problmes make things worse. I use different sites for different articles and they’re all wonderful information. Thanks again. “surferwife”
Comment by Laurie PK on 24 May 2009:
Surferwife Nancy, thanks for visiting and commenting! That’s great that you and your hubby are actively working towards improving your marriage. It can be energy and time-consuming to have marriage goals and actually work to achieve them, but….it’s so worth it.
I’m glad you came through the rough patch; I think the lows unite us more than the highs ever could.
By the way, I loved your question on self-tanning. You may have already seen that I answered it in my article http://theadventurouswriter.com/blog/quipstipsachievinggoals/health-wellness/self-tanners-tanning-without-burning-in-the-sun/ .
I hope it helps. If you have any more questions, fire away!
Laurie
Comment by Siri on 1 June 2009:
My husband isn’t interested in me physically. He wants to do second marriage with my permission. He says he wants to be with me and he loves me so much. Could you suggest what should I do?
Comment by Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen on 24 August 2009:
Hi Siri,
I’m sorry I missed your question — I don’t know how it slipped past me! Usually I answer questions fairly quickly.
I suggest you and your husband go to couples counseling (if it’s not too late!). A second marriage isn’t legal in many countries, though it might depend on where you live.
I also suggest that you figure out what you want your marriage to be like, and do whatever you can to achieve that goal. If your husband and you can’t compromise on what your marriage should be like, then you might have to consider not being married to him.
It’s possible for you and your husband to find happiness, but it does require some work and compromise on both your parts!
I wish you all the best,
Laurie