Comments on: How to Survive Sadness and Depression After Breaking Up

By: Jeri

Jeri — Sun, 06 May 2012 13:51:51 +0000

The best way to survive sad feelings and depression after you break up is to get busy. If you sit around you will feel sad but if you get active and interested in life, then you won’t be as sad that you broke up.

And get a puppy or kitten. I rescued a dog after my girlfriend moved out and left me, and I feel alot happier. I want my girlfriend back but I still have love in my life.

By: ankita

ankita — Sun, 06 May 2012 10:54:29 +0000

1 yr is gng to cmplete widout him.. .stil, he is in my mind. Y? Dnt knw,. .tryd to thnk abt othr guys bt it did n’t wrk. .anger, biternes has incrsd in me. .i said him so many bad wrds bt wenevr he is infrnt of my eyes agn i got capture by love . . .dnt knw whether he cme or n’t. Bt i can nevr frget him. .nor i can acept anyone else in my lyf. !

By: Asm

Asm — Tue, 01 May 2012 14:45:40 +0000

I Dnt c where my life goes widout him..it’s been more than 6year we were in relationship..he is abroad..it’s been around 4year we haven’t met personally..I really love him..I Dnt know how deep the connection is but my tear flows non stop while he tells our relation can’t work..my parents are against our marriage coz our kundali didn’t matched..he tells me to run out wid him but I cannot run by making my parent head down..so he finally told me to leave..it’s reAlly tough tomorrow is my first day of office n my heart is really very weak right now Can I survive sadness and depression after breaking up?

By: tay smith

tay smith — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 20:48:30 +0000

I am going through a breakup that hurts to my soul this guy was unemployed and had nothing goin I brought him into my life and my childrens life for a year and pretty much let him leach off of me I finally found a job for him and helped him to get it and guess what he no longer is interested in me he cuts his phone off so I won’t call he now has a car he drives with no liscense I feel so betrayed and I am in pain I even passed out he acted like he loved me so much and I was his life when he was broke now I’m nothing I feel worthless like a looser I have so much pain inside already I am such a good person and everywhere I go there’s pain pain pain y I don’t kno wat to do help please

By: Al

Al — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 21:53:55 +0000

Hi there
It’s been a few weeks for me now and reading these posts is really interesting. I can see some people struggling a lot and others giving really good advice. I feel at the moment still stuckin my break up. I get angry at the freedom my ex partner has now whilst I struggle still with 3 jobs, a mortgage, pets, and a child to finish raising. I feel overwhelmed some days but other days i feel ridiculously happy to be free. The profound sadness reappears and the self-blaming rears its ugly head – I knew there would be regrets but I also know it was the right thing to do.
Break ups are a big challenge. I realise now though that for years there was no love – no real love – because she was unhappy. Its hard to stop. Its hard to give up on everything I have worked so hard for. I worked really, really hard and she became more and more passive. So I guess that what I am doing now is really trying to accept that although I didnt want to let her go, she basically behaved worse and worse and worse and made me feel really bad until it got to the point that I ended the relationship. Now she behaves like a victim, like someone who has had a tough deal. I can’t get over the anger. She is free with no responsibilities and none of the financial strain that I bear – and yet she is running around acting like she is a victim. She had seven years of me being everything – breadwinner, mother, carer, and she withdrew from intimacy with me. So I guess I am still going through the stages of grief, and every time I see her it throws me back. I have to go to mediation this week with her and I am dreading it because she manipulates me all the time and lives to make me angry and upset. And I dont know how to not be upset around her. I am trying to move on but until the divorce is through it seems like all the time I have to face the fact that it ended and there was nothing I could do to make her into a different person. I am also angry at how much time I wasted, time, energy and resources, trying to make it work. I should have ended it at least 2 years ago. So I am really screwed up about the whole thing because its not simple and its not easy and that makes me angry too. She doesnt seem to care very much and shows no remorse. And I am bearing the burden of grief while she runs around having a really busy social life, out and about every other night. I want to move on but the anger is holding me back.
But I believe in myself enough to believe that I will get through this and come out of it a better, more honest person, with integrity and self-respect.

By: CRIMSON

CRIMSON — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 08:12:35 +0000

I’ve found that when a guy doesn’t respond to your text messages, e-mails, calls and so forth, he usually isn’t doing so intentionally, he’s busy doing other things, trying to forget about certain parts of his past. I would know, I’ve had some tough times, too. I may not be the brightest crayon strewn about the house, but I presume that this is out of fear, or a natural quirk that we all have not to touch the things that hurt us, be it physically, emotionally, mentally, etc. Eventually, it will come back to haunt, and when it does, he would do anything to get you back. If you let him, he may repeat the same mistakes that hurt you both in the first place.

By: Frank

Frank — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 11:53:51 +0000

My wife just left me after 17 years of marriage. We have a 13 yo daughter. I cannot eat. I cannot sleep. I cannot work. I love her so much but she says I concentrated more on career than her (i.e. no romance, no passion) and she has found spirituality to help her break up with me. She says I should date other women and she is excited about meeting other men. But I cannot imagine myself with anyone else but her. I have history with her. We started out poor together after Uni with nothing but an old bomb of a car and slowly went about improving ourselves with higher degrees and supporting each other. Sure, we had arguments and she even told me that we lacked love and passion for the last couple of years. But I ignored it except for some initial efforts. How can I get her back and how can I cure this over whelming depression and emptiness. I just wander the shopping mall like a zombie.

By: kelly

kelly — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 20:06:18 +0000

A sincere thank you to Kari. Beautifully stated about the nature of a forest fire and regeneration. To those her doubt her wisdom, read it again. She’s absolutely correct. It’s called Faith. And faith is meant to be challenging. My recommendation is to read some Rumi–that guy KNEW.

By: Alan

Alan — Thu, 22 Dec 2011 09:50:25 +0000

Hi,
I am 29 yrs and I ws in a relationship with this girl ( she is 8yrs younger to me )for 3 yrs and we had frequent fights as well as good times … 3 months back I moved to new city for a better job.. within a month she said she does not have any feelings for me rather someone else even when I was wid her… Without knowing much I went to meet her … There she explained and said all the plans she is having wid her new found person..I am devasted hearing all this and I am feeling so hollow inside after this… I trusted her so much… I have gone crazy now… Doubting my every ability…She and her new bf are from my same college… I know I dont want her in my life but cant forgive her as a result I am not getting peace. For 2 months I have been trying all dat is available…I lost my self confidence… What shall I do.. Please advise

By: tay s

tay s — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 22:21:35 +0000

hi I was wondering if anyone would be kind enough to offer me some advice. I’m 25 and I’ve been in love with my ex-girlfriend for 7 years. She returned those feelings 3 years ago and everything was great. We also moved in together. We were together for 2 years and had a lot of arguments about really small and stupid things but loved eachother very much. She eventually returned home and had enough of the arguments / relationship. Only after her leaving and having my first breakup and loss (she is the only girl I’ve ever been with) have a realized how sorry I am. I’ve tried everything from telling her I want to make things up to emailing her all the time. She isn’t interested and always asks for space. She left on the 26th December 2010 and a whole year has gone by and I feel depressed / down every single day. I wasn’t perfect and it was my first relationship but I have no idea what to do… I don’t want to move on because I can only imagine myself with her and it’s important to me that I’ve only been with her. But after a whole year and it being Christmas, nothing has changed. She only wants space, and we barely keep in contact. I often write long emails to her because I feel bad, and this causes her hurt and only results in her telling me I’m the same as when she left and to stop with those long letters. I don’t know what to do…