Comments on: How to Make Conversation for Introverts – Tips for Small Talk

By: Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 19:18:02 +0000

I agree — talking is draining for me, too! I’m good at making conversation, but don’t really like to. And I’d much rather listen than talk.

By: Claire

Claire — Tue, 28 Dec 2010 20:03:30 +0000

I am extremely introverted but can make small talk appear very natural to the outside world, even though I detest it. The truth is I’d rather not talk in the first place as I find mostly any kind of talking very draining. Although there are exceptions when it comes to people I’m close to but even then I’m mostly very quiet. I don’t mind if people don’t talk to me as it tires me plus I don’t like talking about myself and get sick of the sound of my own voice in the end. I find small talk unnecessary as I don’t feel the need to verbalise my trivial thoughts. I prefer deeper, more meaningful conversations with only my partner or my family. I don’t feel I need friends but have lots of people who want to be my friend as I’ve been told I’m very approachable, (and easy to talk to!) ( I quite enjoy people around me making small talk for a while, as long as I don’t have to be involved. I do like people. Though just from a distance! )

By: Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen — Sat, 09 Oct 2010 02:07:50 +0000

Thanks for your comments. One of my favorite tips for small talk — and I’m an introvert — is to ask questions about what the person has said. I’d much rather listen than talk, and am very curious about people….maybe sometimes I’m a little bit nosy….

By: Craig

Craig — Fri, 01 Oct 2010 18:44:45 +0000

I really like the tip about letting your mistakes shine through. Often introverts think a conversation has to go perfectly in order to make an impression. But being imperfect takes the pressure off and makes the other person feel more comfortable.

Also, don’t try to force conversation. Judge your moods; sometimes we try too hard, and the conversations that go the best are usually the ones we don’t plan. Introverts are often guilty of forcing themselves to be social even when they aren’t in the mood. It’s good to push your comfort zone, but do it when you are on top of your game and are feeling sociable.

Great tips!

By: Jeremy

Jeremy — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 14:33:20 +0000

My problem with making small talk is that I forget everything I learned when I’m actually in front of the person I’m trying to make small talk with! I’m an introvert and I get flustered and nervous easily. What works for me is to jot a few reminders on a piece of paper and look at that when I’m in the bathroom or when she’s in the bathroom, and then I can usually regroup.

I like your tips, and will be making a new “cue card” with them!

Thanks,
J.

By: Susan Liddy

Susan Liddy — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 19:54:29 +0000

What a fun article!
I love the breadcrumb idea and smile with your eyes.
People are so interesting and we LOVE it when someone takes an interest in us.

I also remember that if I am feeling “awkward” the other person may be too. So, get out of my own head and really “see” the person I’m talking with.

Susan

PS. All of these tips can be used for first dates too!