If you want to achieve your financial goals, you have to have a good relationship with money! Here’s how wealth coach Belinda Fuchs defines it, including specific steps to improving your relationship with money.
“People who have a poor relationship to money feel poor no matter how much money they have in the bank,” says Fuchs. “Even as they make more and more money, their stress increases, they save less, and their problems just have more zeroes on them. This is the world of scarcity: people feel owned by their money instead of feeling powerful as the owner of their money.”
Fuchs’ three steps to improving your relationship with money will help you save more and spend less! And to learn more about money and your personality, click on Your Money or Your Life: 9 Steps to Transforming Your Relationship With Money and Achieving Financial Independence by Vicki Robin et al.
3 Steps to Improving Your Relationship With Money
Step 1: Identify your relationship to money.
Understand what money means to you. Is it power, control, joy, happiness, freedom, or is it just a way of keeping score? Here are four questions to focus your responses:
- How would you describe your relationship to money and your current money management habits?
- When you hear the words money, wealth, or rich, what comes to mind?
- What did your parents tell you about money?
- How do you currently act with money?
Step 2: Compare your answers to the supportive and non-supportive belief criteria.
Were your thoughts and feelings empowering or disempowering? Supportive beliefs provide encouragement, empowerment and positive feelings. Non-supportive beliefs can bring disempowerment, helplessness, hopelessness, and panic. (Overcoming your financial fears is a great way to improve your relationship with money!)
Your answers to the questions above form your Belief Systems about money — affectionately called your “B.S.” It’s the made-up scripts created over your lifetime.
Examples of non-supportive beliefs:
- If I try and I don’t succeed at making money, I’ll be a failure.
- I have to work very hard for money and I won’t be able to make money doing what I love.
- Making money will take time away from my family and people won’t like me.
- I don’t deserve to have a lot of money.
- I’ll never have enough no matter how much I make.
Step 3: Consciously upgrade your beliefs. The good news is that there’s an alternative – you can improve your relationship to money! Even though you don’t have a direct impact on financial markets, you do have 100% impact on your personal beliefs. You can choose to leave your money past in the past…starting today.
Make a decision now to “own your money.” Be willing to go to the core of the non-supportive beliefs and recognize that the opposite is truer than the “B.S.” you’ve been holding onto. Consciously choose supportive beliefs!
If you have any questions or thoughts about these steps to improving your relationship with money, please comment below!
Belinda Fuchs is the President of OwnYourMoney.com – and offers two quizzes to determine if you own your own money, or if it owns you (for singles and for couples). Fuchs is also the host of Boston‘s newest TV talk show “Money on Your Mind.”
I'm glad you're here! My name is Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen; my husband Bruce and I live in Vancouver, BC with our critters. We can't have kids, and are learning to accept whatever life brings - both good and bad. I have an MSW (Master of Social Work) from UBC, and degrees in Education and Psychology. I hope you say hello below - I can't give relationship advice, but writing can bring you clarity and insight.